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Politics and Activism

The Importance Of Having An Honest Friend

Why you won't always be the most popular, and that's okay.

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The Importance Of Having An Honest Friend

You hear the word honest, and it accompanies a few connotations. If you're honest as a girl, you're often labeled with a myriad of adjectives. If you're honest about an issue that's unpopular, you need to learn to just be quiet. If you're upfront as a friend, you're rude and insensitive.


Maybe if we were all a bit more honest, our friendships would last longer. Our relationships wouldn't be so trivial. Our social media wouldn't be edited images of our lives that were airbrushed and the only tidbits of our day that we get approval and feel acceptance. Honesty isn't always just about delivering some harsh news and some necessary reality. It's complimenting those shoes you keep staring at in class because that girl is rocking that outfit today. Telling that boy in Poli-Sci you sincerely like his cargo shorts...or maybe not. It's telling your parent that you're thankful for all that they've done for you. Honesty, the simple part of our lives we often evade because it's uncomfortable.

Because it's unpopular, many people can't handle it. I still get confused when someone compliments me and means it. If I get told great job for my work instead of a retweet, it feels odd. As a friend, I've had to say some uncomfortable things and push people. My friends have had to push me right back. No growth happens within a comfort zone. Centuries before millennials existed, the evasion of truth became a popular system of communication. Now we hide behind screens to tell people how we really feel, because communication is a lost art.

You don't do anyone a favor if you can't simply say that you don't agree with something or you're uncomfortable when necessary. It's easy to get caught up in the communication that doesn't matter, small talk and texting casually about your day, and at the end of it you haven't really said anything. We're so good at being connected and facetious, never fully delving into things that matter and really understanding each other. Get the coffee, say the things that matter, breathe a sigh of relief that you said something authentic for yourself.

Sometimes, someone will need an honest friend. Someone to call them on their actions, and be a little beacon of light in the sea of drama and exhaustion. You could be the person that reminds someone that their day wasn't so terrible. Someone could be ready to quit your organization and you telling them "good job" could keep them there. Don't go to that party if you really don't want to, and above all, be kind. Our world needs more kindness.

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