The hardest thing for any human is the inability to let go. Memories, we never seem to lose -- they keep us coming back. Within our minds, we keep memories of people we've met, places we've seen and things we've touched. We grasp a moment and they flourish inside us. You feel those memories rushing within you, those memories of a person, place or song that reel you back in. That feeling, that peak of rush from those perfect moments keep you somewhere. Somewhere, anywhere you wish to be. You begin to build from that, altering the reality of that memory, creating something more. What you begin to build from that is unreal. It keeps you in the drift of hope, faith, and excitement, living and feeding off of a past sense of being we used to be in.
As simple as a sound: the swift knock of the wind against your door, or the rhythmic patterns of the rain thumping against the moist soil. With each sound, there is a familiar feel.
Or maybe we replay a memory because we didn't do more, we didn't appreciate a moment or take it, and made something of it. We replay an idea, a thought of a moment that once was and dance with it, in hope that someday we can find peace with whatever lingers within our minds. We become that person we didn't mean to be, a child living in a lonely world of their own fantasies. Altering a memory and recapitulating it, it only becomes a fantasy. After all you can't change a memory. We are consumed with a plethora of doubts, replaying job interviews, past opportunities and relive moments with people we thought were meant to stay in my lives forever. You become consumed in what if's and analyze every little bit, thinking that you missed a detail that could change the way it ended.
That person who walked away, have you had the time to say one more thing, would they still be in your life? Or those moments you missed when your relationship was beginning to drift?
Those thoughts replay in your brain, your mind growing exhausted of the idea that you once had control of certain situations that occurred in your life.
The hardest thing for anyone is allowing yourself to let go -- what a beautiful and most unfortunate thing.
As we grow older, we forget some crucial moments in our lives, good and bad, but our minds tend to wonder to back from time to time, reevaluating the past. We let go after time yes, but those memories remain hidden behind our new passions, moments, ideas and essentially what becomes our new lives.
Then one day, we think back in the early morning, maybe you are sitting alone or with your significant other, in your new apartment, your cluttered house or quiet town home. You ponder at the life you once had, as you sip a dark coffee, or a fresh ice tea. We look back on those past memories that once filled us with passion or regret. Then you notice.
You made the right decision after all. You appreciate memories for what they are, memories. Those beautiful memories you once replayed are appreciated even more.