Preface: This article is in no way trying to make the girls that found their home feel any different about their sisterhood or their results from recruitment.
All through high school, I based my college experience on what house I would pick during Sorority Recruitment. I would creep through the discover page on Instagram and just dream about the experiences that I would encounter through college. I had my date party outfits planned out and the captions for different events just waiting on the notes on my phone. I was ready to be a "Srat" and I thought about it almost every single day of high school.
1. Five minutes of conversations do NOT define your worth
Before walking into the house during rush there was a flood of emotions, how well would the conversations end up? Have they already paired me with a girl that is supposed to have a lot of things in common with me? Will the President of the chapter come in and talk to me so I know they are interested? Many of the conversations would flow and some would just want to make you go watch paint dry. It's super easy to feel which houses you just vibe with and after you will wonder what went wrong when you get your houses for the next day.
2. No reward for the discomfort
All week during rush through the heat, walking, no phones, and horrible food, I was able to get through it. I knew what I was going through at the moment, would not compare to the joy I would be feeling with my new pledge class in the years to come. When I actually had looked back to the torture that brought a lot of disappointment and broken dreams.
3. Full schedule to all disappointment
At the beginning of rush, they told us that everyone's experience would be different and to not be disappointed if your roommate or friend has different preferences than you. This being said it is nothing to be ashamed of if you didn't get asked back to certain houses or even any houses at all. Although I was asked back to many houses, they were not the houses that I preferred to go back to so I thought there was no hope for what I wanted.
4. Watching through a phone screen
Bid day was kind of like a "you can look but don't touch" type of feeling. I drove home right after I had dropped out of recruitment for a birthday party and then came back that Saturday and just hung out in the dorm scrolling through Instagram crying. I couldn't believe that everything I had planned on in my high school career had not come true and I was left "sisterless."
I am NOT writing this to make anyone feel bad for me, trust me, I have gotten plenty of I am so sorry or what happened? Why aren't you in a house? I chose to drop out of recruitment because I did not have the experience I wanted to spend my next 4 years in.
I write this for the girls who may not have gotten the chance to spend the next 4 years with who they thought they would and were left disappointed. Although I thought that being in a sorority was going to be the best thing in college (it may be for some girls.), I do not feel as if it was a missed opportunity. I have still had many encounters in college with wonderful people that have changed my life for the better. Some of my very close friends are in sororities and love it and I am super happy they found their home.
Moral of the story: not being in a sorority is not going to ruin your life, being in a sorority may not be for you. It is okay, everyone has different experiences, the important thing is making sure that you find happiness.