Coming from someone who has dealt with insecurities her entire life, I’ve got this topic covered.

Insecurities come in all shape and sizes, and so do people. For me, I’ve been insecure about my weight since I was about 12. I was constantly struggling to feel pretty and accepted when society today only really embraced and advertised the “thin” girl. How is anyone supposed to keep with those standards? I’m sorry, but I am NOT a size 0 and I never will be. But today’s society is so two-faced!

They’re constantly telling us girls that even though we aren’t as skinny as the girls on the Victoria Secret runway that it’s okay because beauty isn’t about what size dress you wear but how big your heart is. Okay, fine then. But on the other hand, society is shaming those same models because they’re “too thin”. They look anorexic, unhealthy, etc.

Where is this idea that beauty is seen in all different sizes? Because if you’re telling me it’s not about my dress size but more about the size of my heart, then you, my friend, don’t know what you’re talking about.

I’ve ALWAYS struggled with how to cope with my insecurities. Whether you’re insecure about your weight, like me, or your acne (which I’ve also dealt with), the size of your legs, your athletic ability, the color of your hair, WHATEVER IT IS, how do we deal with it? Because let’s face it; we’ve read these posts before… the ones that talk to us about getting a new perspective, and facing our insecurities head on… blah, blah, blah. I feel better for about 5 minutes after I read them and then I go out, coming back to realize, “Wow, I looked HUGE in this outfit.” Everything I read goes in one ear and out the other.

So what makes this go away? How can I look in the mirror and finally be happy about what I see? Because quite honestly, I don’t like what I see half the time. I think about how I feel, my perspective on how I look, and I just get angry!

I think, “Why is my boyfriend with someone who looks this way?”, and whether or not everyone I hang out with and wonder if believes that I’m the “fat friend.”

Why does this matter so much to me? I’m honestly asking because I don’t have an answer! I don’t know what to do about my insecurities! I don’t know how to make the thoughts in my head line-up with the way I know I should think about myself.

All I can tell you is this:

1. Take it one day at a time, remembering to breathe.
2. Become someone you like, not someone you’re pretending to be.
3. Realize what you want, not just what other people want from you.
4. Push yourself out of your comfort zone.
5. Focus on where your strengths are, not where you think you’re lacking.

I know that I can’t let my insecure thoughts take over my head, but a lot of times they do. I hate looking at pictures of myself because I always think my arms look too flabby, and my stomach looks too big. Other people think I’m crazy, but you know what? They aren’t fighting the same battle and honestly, I don’t want to hear it from them!

All I can do is control my thoughts. I can do this. My size doesn’t matter and I can be comfortable in my own skin and I will work hard to get there.