Dear Settler,
I know what it feels like to always feel as though you’re settling for less than what you deserve just to enjoy the taste of temporary satisfaction. To feel as though you’re accepting the fact that you’ll never truly be happy with the way that your life is playing out, but out of fear of destroying the sub-par life that you’ve built for yourself you don’t dare disturb the balance. Whether this is being applied to your romantic relationships, your fitness goals or your career aspirations, you just always find yourself settling for mediocre and “OK”. Life doesn’t have to be just “OK”. I, personally, don’t want to wake up everyday for the rest of my life accepting the fact that my life isn’t great nor is it terrible, it’s just floating around somewhere in between.
When it comes to my romantic relationships, more recently than ever, I’ve noticed that I find myself settling for partners who are just alright. We might have a few common interests, like hiking and eating pizza, but when I look at the guys that I date, I don’t see long-term partners or marriage material. I see college fun and a swift break up three years down the line. I guess that that’s alright for the moment; I’m young, in college and certainly not looking for a husband anytime soon. Even with that being said, I think I would be doing myself a huge favor if I started dating more guys who fit within the expectations that I have of my future husband. I don’t have to keep settling for late night drunk texts and being a convenience for someone. I deserve the same form of love that I’m more than willing to give.
As for fitness goals, I’m constantly settling for unhealthy habits under the guise of accepting myself and the body that God has given me. God didn’t make me fat, eating two McChicken sandwiches and a medium fry from McDonalds made me fat. I am in control of my own destiny and that includes my health. I’ve taken the steps necessary to help myself to lose weight and be more health conscious (goodbye high blood pressure!), but every so often I find myself sitting down with a family size bag of chips and rationalizing the fact that I am the way I am. I don’t have to settle for that. I don’t have to settle for waking up every morning with achy joints and stomach cramps because I ate too much and didn’t exercise enough. I don’t have to settle for going to the mall with my friends and feeling annoyed and envious because certain clothes aren’t in my size or don’t fit my body the way that they fit theirs. I don’t have to settle for watching other girls my age running marathons for fun while I’m struggling to walk up four flights of stairs without dying. I don’t have to settle for this and I’m not going to. I have the potential to be the healthiest version of myself that I can be and with a lot of hard-work and determination. Right now, I’m on the right path for not settling.
Next to relationships, the biggest area of my life in which I feel as though I’m constantly settling is within my educational life. Anybody who knows me will tell you that I am one of the most ambitious and hard-working people that you will ever meet. I have huge, sometimes seemingly unrealistic goals, and I have to drive to reach those goals. Unfortunately, there are times when this drive falls short. My freshman year of college felt a lot like my freshman year of high school; I simply did not try as hard as I could have in my classes because I assumed they would be easy. Unlike high school, I was taking some pretty challenging classes, so my GPA definitely paid the price for it. Where I should have been studying to achieve A’s and B’s, I was taking C’s and using the cliche “C’s get degrees” to rationalize that it would be okay. C's don't get you into medical school and C's certainly don't deserve to make the big bucks. I didn’t realize how much I was really settling until I got my grades back and all of my friends were posting about making the Dean’s List on social media and I was just happy that I kept my GPA above a 3.0. I don’t and will not settle for being an average student. I didn’t get myself in serious debt and move all the way across the country to go to school to just be an average student. I deserve success in every aspect of my life, and like my health, I have to put in the hard work to get to that success.
Everybody settles for things at times, but that doesn’t mean that you have to make it a habit. Everyone needs a helping hand at times, but if you want great things to happen to you, you have to believe in your abilities and make them happen for yourself. Take control of your life and don’t rationalize your settling because the more you do it the further you’ll start to sink into this hole that it will be impossible to climb out of. Take care of yourself and always fight for what you need and deserve in every aspect of your life.
