My entire childhood and well into my teenage years I was always plagued with a giant fear. It wasn't a fear of spiders, killer clowns, or even death. I had the fear of being alone. I was constantly so worried that I would never find the person I was supposed to spend my life with. Even worse at times, I would fear that no one would ever want to spend their life with me.
Every day I would look in the mirror and try to figure out what was wrong with me. I would pray and ask God what I was doing wrong. What did I need to change about my appearance? What did I need to do differently to make my relationships work? I put so much focus on trying to find the perfect person that I was meant to spend my life with.
Then everything changed.I stopped looking. I quit searching.The stress of life, college, and working caught up with me and I started to focus on myself.
When I stopped looking for that perfect person was when he fell into my lap. I agreed to go on a blind date with a guy I had only seen a couple pictures of and texted briefly. I suggested a quick date to get ice cream (I was scared he would be a closet axe murderer). I figured this date would end like others in the past. I would get attached and then realize I couldn't see myself spending my life with this guy. This date was different though.
James got out of his truck with his hat turned backward and a nervous grin across his face. We exchanged hellos and went inside. He was a gentleman and paid for my ice cream. We sat in a booth and exchanged small talk while we ate our ice cream. At one point I got chocolate ice cream all over my chin and he gave me the sweetest look. I could tell there was no judgment behind his eyes and that was when I started to feel something. We ended up leaving and walking downtown. We looked at murals, laughed at drunk people, and talked. We talked and talked and talked for hours. At the end of the night I was sad to see him go. We texted well into the night and agreed to see each other soon.
After that date, I spent nearly every day with him. We shared stories, secrets, and I opened up to him more than I had with anyone else. To this day I am so grateful that I agree to go on that blind date. I got to meet the most genuine, caring, motivated, and loving person I have ever met. James ended up being everything I've ever prayed for and more. There is no one else I would rather grow with and support. What was supposed to be a quick (hour tops) date turned into me meeting James who I am so head over heels for.
My advice to anyone looking for a relationship is this: stop. That perfect someone will come into your life when you least expect it. It will be the most amazing thing when you meet that someone who compliments your personality and being in every way.