The Gallagher's Guide To Thanksgiving | The Odyssey Online
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The Gallagher's Guide To Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving with a side of tragedy

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The Gallagher's Guide To Thanksgiving
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Nothing is ever what is seems at the Gallagher household as the South Side Chicago family continues to try and make ends meet. They take dysfunctional to a whole new level and if you've watched the show you can't help but allow the Gallagher's to capture your heart and rip your hair out at the parenting number Frank and Monica did on these kids. This family is one of a kind and even through its humor it shows the hardships they face. With Thanksgiving coming up what better way to get through the holidays than with the help of your favorite All-American family. I give you the Gallagher's guide to Thanksgiving.

1) Smuggle your drug dealer's daughter's boyfriend into the country in a boxcar shipping container.

2) Get your estranged wife to seduce your brother to get the money your mother sent him and not you.

3) Pawn presents for rent and food money because your mother stole the "squirrel fund" from the coffee canister.

4) Don't encourage your mom to sleep with your ex-fiancé because it's weird and she's into even weirder shit. Eskimo sisters to a disturbing new level.

5) Wish your siblings an eternity in hell during grace. Way to go, Frank..

6) Shoot up a liquor store because you want beer only to have it backfire when the owner pulls out a rifle and has no idea how to use it.

7) If you can't get a turkey, you can always eat a duck.... or a bald eagle. FYI it's illegal to kill our nation's bird and tamper with their trackers.

8) Invite the homeless guy who bathes in your pool to dinner because why not?

9) Give birth to a baby, not knowing who the father is, give it up for adoption, then have your clinically insane mother steal it because you don't want to raise it.

10) Steve/Jimmy to the rescue. Low and behold, there is a turkey at last.

11) Find out you're sleeping with your sister's boyfriend's dad.

12) End it with a mental breakdown and a trip to the ER.

13) Drink yourself stupid and pass out on the side of the road. Typical Frank move.

Tis the season to be thankful so don't forget to remind yourself all you have to be thankful for, especially not being a Gallagher.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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