We started off as friends from a young age. Whether it was through mutual friends or an assigned seat in class we became the best of friends. We talked every day in school, texted every night and hung out whenever and wherever we could. We would video chat or join the same clubs just so we could spend even more time with each other. We were the best of friends. Neither of us saw an end to our friendship, because why would we. When someone thought of me they thought of all of you and when they thought of you they thought of me too. But life is full of the unexpected and we changed. We drifted and no one knew until it was too late to do much about it.
If you would have asked me in the midst of any one of the friendships I’m speaking about, not one would I have ever seen as coming to an end. We planned on being each other’s’ children’s godparents. We expected having our children grow up together and be the best of friends just like we were. We expected to be in each other’s weddings. I even thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with someone who slipped away. We expected to grow old together, but everything happens for a reason.
I learned from every person I lost who I thought would be by my side forever. Some people taught me that people will use you to benefit themselves and for however long it will benefit them and then will just leave. That started to build a wall inside of me, one that made it harder for me to become so close to someone but it showed me that not everyone has a heart like mine and that’s okay. Some people taught me that when you follow your heart and do what makes you happy, against their recommendation, they won’t be supportive and it will cause arguments. This showed me that not everyone is going to support my decisions, but the people who truly care for me will be there every step of the way even through my mistakes. Some people taught me that I can be a bad friend, and taught me that if I truly cared about someone I needed to show it. Some people taught me that you can know a person like the back of your hand, and they can know you better than you know yourself, and they can still act in a way that completely surprises you. That showed me that you can’t put all your eggs in one basket, because you can wake up one day with nothing but broken or stolen eggs. So even though they were tough lessons learned, in the end I am more than grateful for each of those people in my life.
Each friend that I thought I’d have in my life forever is still technically “in my life” because I still think about them. There are still things that I come across that makes me think of you. There are still moments when I pick up my phone to text you about something in my life and realize that you don’t know my everyday schedule anymore. I still think about you and your families because at one point in time you and yours were basically my extended family. I still know your birthday, your favorite holiday (if it didn’t change) and I still hold all of the good memories close. Just know that when someone shoves a cupcake in my face, I think of you. When someone mentions drama club, I think of you. When someone mentions Montana, I think of you. When someone talks about science class in High School, I think of you. When someone talks about football, I think of you. When someone says best friend, I still think of you… and I hope you think of me too.
