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The Five Stages of Yom Kippur

Most commonly confused with The Five Stages of Grief, coincidence?

Jordyn Boscia

Oct 14, 2016

Marymount Manhattan College

235

playbuzz.com

1. Bold Acceptance, and Confidence

As the day begins, you're feeling pretty good - you are the Beyonce of the Jews. The, "I did this last year" phrase starts off your morning and honestly, nothing can stop you. You're determined, ready, and can't wait to show it to the man.

2. Denial

The day drags on and no, you didn't just hear your stomach growl. Ha, What? No. Absolutely not. You're fine - totally, utterly fine. You're not even hungry, not even a little bit.

You're lying. You're not fine. You're hungry.

3. Bargaining

"What if I just snack a little bit, that's better than eating a full meal. I mean, I can repent my sins next year, it's not a big deal"

4. Depression

While trying to distract yourself, you aimlessly scroll through Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Suddenly, you are bombarded with every appetizing Tasty video, or friends posting their delicious meal today. You want it, and you're starting to hit rock bottom. It's unavoidable, you're most likely sad, really, really sad.

5. Anger

The sun is setting, you're starving, and you're nothing but hangry. The accomplished feeling is long gone, and anger takes over. You've waited long enough for the bagels, and you want them now.

Happy Yom Kippur, eat enough to survive until next year!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Five Stages of Yom Kippur

Most commonly confused with The Five Stages of Grief, coincidence?

1. Bold Acceptance, and Confidence

2. Denial

3. Bargaining

4. Depression

5. Anger

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No one best represents the struggle like our favorite 90s squad.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

2. When there is only one section of a popular course.

3. Receiving the 18,000 emails reminding you to register ASAP.

4. When you need to see an advisor, but they are too busy/unresponsive.

5. Trying not to dress like a bum for your appointments with your advisors/department heads.

6. When you have a perfectly planned out schedule, and one class ruins it.

7. Carefully moving things around to accommodate a different class/section.

8. Waking up at 6:00 a.m. for your enrollment time.

9. Concocting a new schedule at your enrollment time after your original plan gets changed.

10. Getting into a class and filling the last available seat.

11. When all of your classes finally go through.

12. Realizing that you forgot a class that was a pre-requisite for everything else.

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."

What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?

What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?

What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?

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Because who understands your bitterness better than April?

1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

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