Feminism according to Merriam-Webster: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes.
Feminism according to various social media feeds and comment sections: a movement instigated by men-hating women aimed at nitpicking the position of women in society.
Clearly, there is a bit of discord here. Societal perceptions of feminism range widely. Some herald third-wave feminism as the current great social movement; others dismiss it as a bunch of prissy Tumblr girls finding something new to complain about. Others adhere to the ideals of feminism, but refuse to label themselves as such either because of the negative connotation or because they prefer the term “egalitarian”.
(Respectfully, I feel that is sort of a cop-out. If your largest problem with a social movement is the word used to describe it, you should reevaluate your perception. Keep in mind that the term feminism is essential because it is feminine qualities that are seen as lesser in our society, whether possessed by men or women.)
What this discord has created is a general dislike and distrust of mainstream feminism. This exists both between feminists and non-feminists, as well as within feminism as a whole movement. There is no one form of feminism that can possibly be universally adopted; personal convictions and values will always have an influence on an individual’s ideology.
Some problematic forms of feminism, however, can be confronted. And the first step to confronting and mending the flaws of feminism that allow anti-feminist to attack the movement is to acknowledge them.
One such flaw is the concept of “white feminism”. Bloggers will often cite Taylor Swift or Demi Lovato as exemplary models of white feminism. The issue with this form of feminism is that it ignores the effects of intersectionality on the experiences of people of color. It focuses on the oppression of feminine qualities without addressing the ways in which race contributes to this hierarchy. Take, for example, the announcement of Zendaya’s Barbie doll, which featured her dread hair. Demi Lovato, instead of congratulating the young star on representation of features that are commonly looked down upon, scolded Barbie for not making a doll of someone like her with a fuller figure. Aside from the clear divide that this causes between women, it also gives anti-feminists ammunition to claim that feminists will never be satisfied.
Another flaw stems from cultural and ideological differences. Most feminists will agree that slut-shaming is deplorable. Most will herald the sexual and expressive freedom of women in society. However, there is a flip side to this coin. Because some feminists are so adamant about expressing the independence of women, they attack those who choose to adhere to more traditional roles. If a woman dresses conservatively or chooses to stay at home or acts more submissive or adheres to expected gender roles, they are ridiculed. But it is not them acting in such a way that should offend feminists. Regardless of if a person dresses provocatively or covers up, acts as the breadwinner or tends to the home, has a dominant personality or defers to their significant other, what matters is that it is that person’s choice. No person should be relegated to a role because of their gender. If however, they choose to fulfill that role because it is what they enjoy, it is their right to do so. And this doesn’t have to be seen as a way of undermining the feminist movement; through our support of such decisions, we can ensure that the ideals of feminism remain strong regardless of the roles feminists choose to fulfill.
Lastly: misanthropy. To be blunt, “man-hating feminism” is not feminism. It is misanthropy. However, acknowledging this should not be a way of scapegoating misanthropic ideas. Because the reality is that many misanthropes label themselves as feminists. That is not a label that can be ignored. Not only is it damaging to public perception of feminism, but it also proves toxic to the ideology itself. Much like hate groups that take biblical passages and twist them to fit their personal vendettas, misanthropes take the feminist ideology and warp it to drive a man-hating movement. And while it is true that many of the problems that feminism addresses are the result of a patriarchal society that rewards traditionally masculine behaviors and characteristics, the way to confront this problem is not through promoting the oppression of another gender.
Feminism has its problems, just like any other ideology. Just like religious or political or social ideologies. Its execution is not perfect. But we cannot allow ourselves to forget its premise.
Feminism is, essentially, egalitarianism. But the word is important. The word encapsulates the idea that feminine qualities are looked down upon, that women are the gender most strongly oppressed by a patriarchal society. The misconception of feminism is one of its greatest barriers.
It’s time to get educated. An ideology is only as sound as those who practice it.