Recently, I completed one of the most significant milestones of adulthood. Nope, this wasn't graduating from college or technical school, buying a car, or getting a job, but rather something a bit more specific and elusive: buying furniture at IKEA. After a combination of furnished apartments, extended stay hotels, minimalist living, car camping, and cheap Craigslist deals for a number of years, I had to finally give in and go do it.
All joking aside though, I actually had a conversation with a friend the other day about this: buying more stuff for your home makes it feel too permanent. After all, in ~13 months I have not only moved four times, but lived in four different cities and three different states. One of them, in a suburb of Cleveland, was for a total of six weeks before I decided to pay an extra fee and terminate my lease. Less than a year later, I moved again, but this one was more extreme: Ohio to Texas, twenty hours of driving, and if it didn't fit in my car I didn't bring it. Furniture was sold or scrapped, clothes were donated, and it felt great. After a few nights of sleeping in parking lots, I arrived in Houston, moved into a hotel, and dumped most of my stuff into a five-foot storage unit. Within a few months, I was off to Georgia and the process repeated, only this time with an actual apartment.
As it turns out, many of my close circle of friends have similar pasts: skydivers living dropzone to dropzone, kayakers and climbers who often travel and live out of vans and trucks, and others who have sufficient but minimal accommodations and no long-term geographical ties. Likewise, many people I know who live much more established and permanent lives talk about the stress it breeds and how they yearn for the freedom to live a more dynamic lifestyle. Doing something as simple as relocating suddenly becomes a massive hassle thanks to many complications that are so easy to prevent. This is exactly what I am afraid of: living a life that feels too permanent.
When I was walking around IKEA, and looking around at the various items and set-ups in the showroom, it didn't feel right. Granted they have some great stuff for awesome deals, but overall something about it kind of bother me. Not only are some of the prices astronomically high for a basic function (i.e., a table is just a flat object to set stuff on), but a lot of the appeal seems to cater to a single desire: To set up your 'dream home.' I'm as capitalist as they come but I still denounce this as an obvious ruse that preys on consumerism and superficiality. If nothing else, I don't see this idea of a perfect house with overly expensive things as a symbol of success; I see it as a marketing scam. Industries prey on insecurities and emotions, which isn't helped by the fact that society sets pointless definitions of success. People fall into this trap and they end up with a devastating result: a life that becomes semi-permanent and difficult to make serious change from.
Now, I get it: not everybody is as nomadic as I am. Regardless, change can come in many unanticipated forms. Sometimes it's desirable, such as relocating for a job opportunity, recreation, or a significant other. Other times it might be more of a necessary evil, such as in response to a financial or medical condition. Either way, living a more permanent lifestyle comes back as a burden. I have friends who would love to leave and start something new for themselves and their families, but the costs and efforts associated are too discouraging because of their large and full houses, countless possessions, multiple vehicles, contracts, etc. I've heard it too many times that I'd be an idiot not to learn that lesson the easy way. The less permanent my current lifestyle is, the more feasible (as well as less of a hassle) that change becomes.
Finally, in addition to the convenience and opportunity provided by foregoing a more permanent lifestyle, it taps into solving a common fear that nearly everybody suffers from: running out of time. This is an underlying cause of issues such as mid and quarter-life crises, and a huge reason that people look back on mistakes such as marrying the wrong person or not seizing an opportunity out of fear or hassle with such regret. The concept of being open-minded dictates that we should try something before we judge it, and by the same logic, try as many things as possible before deciding on the best one. It's hard to say that your hometown, lifestyle, career interest, or community is what truly makes you happy unless you seriously consider other options. As you get older, you might also notice that things change, and what you once loved is now something you want to move on from. It happens. In either case, it never helps to tie yourself down.
Of course, none of this is meant to be contrary to someone's genuine interests. If the one thing in life you truly actually enjoy is designing your home or raising your family in the town you grew up in, I'm not trying to discourage that. I will, however, discourage decision-making that is influenced by society goals or false definitions of success. I've seen all too many people plant and grow a rather permanent lifestyle just to wish it could be different, and far too few who thought otherwise. We tell our kids not to put all of their eggs in one basket, and we need to make sure we don't do that as well. Life is dynamic and constantly changing, and it is important to understand that sometimes we might need to change our lifestyle with it. I want to see life for all it has to offer, and for that reason, I am very afraid of living a life that feels too locked-down or permanent.
