Modern society has "How to Lose 10 Pounds" on page 3 and "Self Acceptance" on page 23 across every news stand in the grocery store. In an era where people are surrounded with advertisements and media that portray that appearance as of the upmost importance, it's hard to discover what the best of us looks like, no pun intended.
Within the past week, I attended an amazing seminar about sorority and fraternity recruitment: no, we did not sit in a room and learn how to clap and sing door songs. These two amazing women, Tina VanSteenbergen and Kayley-Jean McNarma, from Phired Up Productions were able to stop and have the audience evaluate how we see our selves and how we can better develop the picture of our "best selves."
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Instagram and Facebook are littered with photos that have been photo shopped and do not show who we really are on a day to day basis. Why? These devices are utilized for validation; maybe if I lose 10 pounds or maybe if I edit out my acne I will feel better about my self. The truth? By editing out these imperfections the user is only validating their insecurities. Rather than posting photos that are raw (not using filters nor editing them), photos are posted that are heavily edited in attempts to gain more "likes" on social media; the person who originally posted the photo feels the approval from the photo and its edits.
It's assumed that the best version of our selves is the version that is most approved; which in many circumstances, is the version where we focus on how we look. Hair? Check. Outfit? Check. Makeup? Double check. Camera ready.
Where is the version where we ace that chemistry test? Why isn't this emphasized more? Situations like this are not shared as much as our Friday night out post. Each opportunity that is the same caliber as the test example or greater, "tests us and works to perfect our selves," Tina stated. We, from here, can choose to accept the challenge and allow it to work with us or we can stay in our bathroom Pinteresting the best way to curl our hair.
While it's easier said than done to base our opinions of our selves off of what we have accomplished and who we are rather than what we look like, steps can be made to help reach this state of mind. Accepting who we are and learning to pick out things that we appreciate within ourselves rather than what we wish we could change is one major step. Mirrors can be the worst for self-esteem: it allows us to see what we don't want to see and highlight what could be better. Also, be proud of what you have done. Make a list of accomplishments, no matter how small. Not only acknowledge your accomplishments, but the amount of effort placed into them. Learn to keep moving forward; as cheesy as it may sound, keep looking for more ways to challenge yourself and goals to set. Instead of Instagram likes, focus energy on what you can do.
In a time like today, it's easy to get caught up in what we would change in ourselves and Instagram and Photoshop gives us the ability to do just that. However, applications like this are incredibly harmful and focus energy on how we look rather than what we have done and can do.
