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The Day That I Stopped Living For My Parents

"I've already lived my life, so go live yours" - My Dad

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The Day That I Stopped Living For My Parents
Brandy Blige

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.

-Steve Jobs

We are all people pleasers. Believe it or not. We do things to get reactions, certain reactions. We do things based off of if a person likes it or not. We may put on an outfit and ask,"How does this make me look?" We may not do something that makes us happy because we know it won't make them happy.

This is where parents come in to play. My parents raised me a certain a way. A way that I honestly think every child should be raised. In high school everyone knew that I was Mrs.Goody-two-shoes. Everything that I did was to make my parents proud to be honest. For some reason I was happy but I wasn't actually making me happy. I always wanted that pat on the back from my parents. I looked to them for approval in everything. I mean you are suppose to do that but to a certain extent.

The day that I decided to stop living for my parents was they day that I could truly accept myself. Everything that you do, your parents MAY not agree with. Somethings that they did wasn't fully accepted by their parents. It's normal. My dad was at the sink washing dishes and he was giving me one of his talks. My daddy is very stern and wise. He was honestly hard on us for a reason. I honestly appreciate it. Anyway to hear this coming from him, it made my mouth drop. I recall me asking his permission to do something or just doing something period. He turned around and said, "I've lived my life, so go and live yours. Your'e not me and you're not going to do things as I would. You're you."

Now anyone that knows my dad knows that just WILD of him to say. He's old-school, my dad doesn't play at all. From that point on i've been doing things that would make brandy happy. That doesn't mean you go and do crazy things to ruin your life but that means you be you. Not a certain way in front of your parents and another way someone else. I mean of course you can't act like you would in front of your friends with your parents. There's a fine line between that.

You have to live your life for you. Say you did live your life for your parents. You did EVERYTHING their way. Everything that made them satisfied but not you. Now they've passed away and you're stuck. You're stuck because you forgot how to live. How to live for YOU. You don't want that. No one wants that. You'll find yourself sitting in a corner saying, "Mom do you like this." Mom is gone. "Dad, is he good enough for me?" Dad is gone. My grandaddy always says, "You love who you love and I can't pick them for you." So go with the wave and make yourself happy in whatever you do.

Don't be extreme and never take your parents consideration but take it to a minimum.They are your parents to guide you and show you the way. Enjoy them while they are here.

College is where parents and their kids usually clash. The parents are used to their kids doing things how they want it, since they are under their roof. Then the kids go off and create their own roof. As a millennial, a lot of things are different in our time than with our parents and how they were then. Take that into consideration too. Parents mean well, so do their children.

My parents are open and understanding. Of course that haven't always been that way. When I would come home from college, I would look different or have something new. My parents were like, "You've changed." Yes, I did. I've changed into the person that i'm suppose to be. You will never be the same once you leave home and that's a fact. Good or Bad. Brandy Blige is surely better and wiser.

My parents loved who I've become. I love who I've become as well. I'm my own person. I like new things, different things. Things i've never expected to like. I taken risks to try things (ood things by the way) I travel more. My parents weren't comfortable at all with that. I took that chance and pleaded my case, so now my parents are comfortable with it because I SHOWED I WAS COMFORTABLE WITH IT. Love who you are and who you are going to become.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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