Working in retail taught me a lot of things, including how to run a cash register and how to grow a thicker skin when faced with trouble customers and coworkers. However, working in retail also taught me how to be a good customer. It wasn’t as if I was ever one of those customers that gets irrationally upset when things didn’t go my way, but I go out of my way now to be extra compassionate and patient.

For those readers who aren’t in on the knowledge, I’m going to let you in on a little secret: working in retail, at best, is kind of like purgatory, but during the holidays it is absolute hell. When I first started working at my temporary holiday position, I was excited not only for the money, but also because I was naively excited to get out a bit during the holidays since I was so used to staying at home and not spreading holiday cheer. But, by the twentieth time in a week that I’d dealt with an overly entitled, self-righteous customer, I’d realized that although the risk I took to get that job was calculated, man, was I bad at math. And this was all occurring before Black Friday had even hit.

Retail workers know exactly the kind of people I’m talking about. Sometimes their aura itself poisons your very soul, but other times they seem harmless until they open their mouth and unleash the coupon-demanding demon within. It wears on you after a while, and the looped Christmas music doesn’t help either. By the end of the holiday season, I thought that if I heard “Santa Baby” one more time I would legitimately shove my head into a shoebox and pray for the sweet release of death.

There’s a reason why I’m writing this, and it’s not just a testimonial to what I call “The Great Suffering of Winter 2013.” I’m writing this to remind my readers that each and every employee that you come across this season is just as much of a person as you and I are. This includes retail employees, coffee shop employees, and food service employees, as well as everyone else in between. They are people with friends and families that also likely deserve mountains of gifts, just like the people you, too, may be shopping for. They are just as stressed out as you are, as many of them are also students or struggling to make ends meet. Abusing these employees not only pretty much guarantees they aren’t going to help you to the true best of their ability, but it also is extremely tacky and disrespectful. Trust me when I say that these individuals are not paid enough to do their jobs and deal with abusive customers.

For every wonderful customer (and there were a lot), there were at least three bad ones lined up behind them. If you find yourself getting antsy and frustrated with the retail worker helping you, remember this: usually, if not almost always, it is not the retail worker’s fault. Whatever “it” is, I can promise you, about 95 percent of the time, “it” is not their fault. They don’t choose what corporate makes them do, and they don’t choose the terms and conditions of a coupon or a sale. They didn’t choose for you to forget a coupon at home, and they didn’t choose to not have any extra at the register. They didn’t choose for you to have a bad day, and ultimately, they didn’t purposely choose to make you angry. Retail employees live for positive customer interactions. Even if they say that they don’t, I can promise you that they still appreciate each and every patient, understanding, and respectful customer.

The customer is not always right. But, as a customer, you can make every interaction, not just during the holidays, with the workers that serve you “right” by simply being a good person. Not only does this keep you on the “Nice” list, but you’ll help stave off the slow death workers experience during the holiday season.