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The Couch Made Me Do It

I can't believe I fell asleep again!

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The Couch Made Me Do It
Medical Daily

We all have that one spot that no matter what time of day it is, we fall asleep. It could be the couch, your dad's lazy boy, or the passenger seat in the car. You could be watching your favorite movie, catching up on this week's episode of "Game of Thrones," reading J.K. Rowling's latest addition to the "Harry Potter" series, or trying to finish that essay that is due on Friday for your Literature class.

This couch doesn't care what you're doing. He consumes you, all of you, quicker than a blink of an eye. The couch has an "eat or be eaten" philosophy, makes no sense at all because how could you even begin to eat the couch (unless you're like little Melinda who ate a whale in Where The Sidewalk Ends).

You'll wake up lost and confused, frantically searching for your glasses so you can see the time on the clock, realizing that hours have passed and your essay isn't any close to being complete. Instead, your textbooks are upside-down on the floor, research scattered across the room with little teeth marks in it from your kittens deciding your homework is their new chew toy. You get up off of the couch to find that you were lying on your laptop like it was the teddy bear you used to cuddle as a child at night.

You might have woken up on a new expedition to find the page that you left off on in your book. Falling asleep unexpectedly leads to not putting your bookmark in between the pages, which is honestly my worst nightmare. Not saying that it's a terrible thing to have to reread a section of the book, but then it puts you behind on finding out what the author has been building the suspense up for all of this time.

You could wake up to Netflix asking you if you're still watching, not knowing what journey Netflix decided to take without you today. You fell asleep watching Pulp Fiction, and now How it's Made is teaching you how to make orange juice. You might wake up to learn that you are so many episodes past the episode that you fell asleep during and catching an incredible spoiler that you weren't exactly ready for or that ruins the entire series for you. It may not necessarily have been a terrible episode, but now that you know how it ends what does it even matter going back and trying to pick back up where you left off.

Thanks for nothing, couch. I just wanted to see what would happen to Chuck. Did he ever get some good luck?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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