When I say

I am a Pure Romance Consultant

People respond

Oh, you sell sex toys.

They spit the phrase like it's

a dirty word.

They treat me like

I said I sell drugs

Or my body

Or my soul.

They think that

Just because I sell sex toys

They can make crude remarks

About my work

About my clients

About my body

About me.

But when I say

I am a Pure Romance Consultant

I mean a lot more.

I mean

I am a Relationship Saver

What I have here in this bag

Yes, it can fix the problems you have in bed.

She says she hasn't had sex in two years

Because she isn't attracted to him anymore

She says she is afraid she doesn't love him

She doesn't know that the medications she takes for her anxiety,

The ones that allow her to leave the house each day,

Have stolen her desire

And dried her loins

Til they are barren as the Sahara.

I am a Problem Solver

Because I've Got A Product For That!

I am a body teacher.

The things I have been trained in

Yes I can help you.

She says she has never orgasmed.

She doesn't know how.

She wonders if she is broken.

She doesn't know how to please herself,

Let alone how to let a man please her.

I am an Educator.

Because I've Got A Product For That

And sweetheart, call me when it works

Because I'm gonna buy you a balloon.

I am a Cheerleader

because I won't judge you the way others will.

Yes, I think you are a good person.

She worries she isn't worth a man's touch

Because she has been touched so much

And she cringes away

Thinking words like "Whore" and "Slut"

But I am an encourager

And I've Got A Product for That.

Because she deserves to feel cherished.

So yes I sell sex toys

But I also sell more than that.

I sell confidence in a bottle.

I sell liquid libido.

I sell a happier sex life

I sell better self-esteem

I sell relaxation in a busy life

And excitement in a boring night

I can't sell happiness

But I can sell Pure Romance

And that is basically the same thing.