Sike! I bet you thought this was gonna be a sappy story about how I have a diverse group of friends. Well, you were wrong! (I mean I do have a diverse group of friends but that isn't what this is about). This is about how I'm white as hell.
It is the 4th week of school, 4th! And my friends still have a summer tan. You see, in the summer I actually burn to a crisp, I don't tan. #paleprobs. But this is just unfair at this point, how the heck are they so tan? How do they maintain this golden color? These are pertinent questions I need answered.
The color of friendship is defined by how tan your friends are compared to yourself. I am basically the cream of an Oreo and they are beautiful Salted Caramel Mochas from Starbucks. I am pale as all heck and that will never change. Thankfully, my tan friends love me anyways!
Also, side note, props to Katey for coming up with this title!