How many people can admit that they have made poor choices and mistakes? As you’re reading this you may be thinking of a few. We’ve all made a mistake. Sometimes we hurt ourselves and our potential by making decisions that involve the wrong people, being involved in the wrong areas and or self-medicating ourselves with excessive drugs and or alcohol.
When you’re best friend or family member succumbs to illness and has to depend on you or medical staff to care for them, and you know it’s a poor choice that they’ve made, how does that affect you? Do you feel like it is partially your fault because you didn’t call the behavior out early on when it was initially detectable?
This article does not serve to make anyone feel bad. Instead, it is the telling of an older gentlemen’s story on behalf of his daughter in an effort to raise awareness about excessive alcohol and substance use. She wants the readers to know that the choices we make affect those within and outside of our close circle.
His daughter's strong will, determination and, most importantly, her consistent unwavering prayers and faith helped her to deal with everything.
Mr. Elliott Adams, Jr. will be 62 later on this month (November), and in his six decades of life he has faced some adversity.
In his youth (early 20’s) Adams was one of the best horse groomsmen in his native county of Aiken, SC.
Mr. Adams had a true love and passion for horse grooming. He sustained injuries such as broken bones and needing to have a plate placed in his hand as a result of his career. His daughter recalls that he worked a lot and she was unable to spend as much time with him as a result.
He lost his marriage and wife of 26 years, precious memories with his two children, his own ability to go places on his own without constant assistance, his passion for working with horses, and the memory of gospel song lyrics .
Mr. Adams doesn't have an issue remembering his daughter, son-in-law, grandchildren or siblings. However, he does not often remember that some of his siblings and his mother are deceased but it does seem at times his mind is sharp. Mr. Adams may ask the same question about ten times how is deceased mom doing. His faith in Christ continues to be strong.
In November 2014, Mr. Adams was diagnosed with alcohol dementia. Mr. Adams overall was relatively healthy. The illegal drugs of cocaine and continued alcohol sent Mr. Adams health into decline over the years. His daughter Mary recalls the year 2013 when her dad laughed inappropriately at things that were not funny to others. She brushed this behavior off.
It wasn’t until November 7, 2014 that he was taken to a local hospital when the laughing continued. On that day, they discovered that he was unable to remember basic information such as his birthday, the current president and most importantly that he’d be turning 60 on the 21.
Mr. Elliott thought he was going to die and he felt that because he knew he was in bad shape. He stayed in the hospital for almost a month until early December. After several tests had been run, it was determined Mr. Adams has alcohol dementia. His daughter refers to it as substance induce dementia.
According to his daughter, alcohol dementia came about after he was told he should stop drinking and using cocaine continuously. It brings about dementia earlier for African-Americans than it would for other races.
Mr. Adams suffered brain damage, memory loss, slowness in his walking and movement, fragility in his limbs.
One of the most disturbing outcomes of chronic alcohol abuse is alcoholic dementia. It is quite similar to Alzheimer’s disease as it impacts memory and cognitive ability. This dementia type can develop in people of any age. Some of the causes of alcohol dementia are excessive alcohol consumption which can lead to severe brain loss and damage to brain cells.
According to alcoholrehab.com chronic alcoholics tend to have a poor diet and don’t typically receive all the nutrients they need to function properly. Most alcohol beverages contain poor nutrients and vitamins. Cells need thiamine to do their job within the body, and with a lack of this vitamin and excessive drinking, this leads to this problem.
Some of the symptoms include mental confusion, being paranoid, a lack of coordination in the muscles, being agitated, problems in the eyes, severe memory loss.
The best treatment for a patient going through this illness is: to permanently stop drinking alcohol and to fix the thiamine deficiency as this will stop the progression of dementia. However, if the patient has suffered excessive brain damage there may be little hope of a full on recovery.
Patients who have suffered in this way are typical to bed rest and remaining in the hospital for long periods of time. Most alcoholics also suffer from alcohol withdrawals. Because their bodies are so immune to it, once they stop drinking their bodies feel as if they are incapable of functioning properly unless they have the substance.
Substance-induced dementia is caused by long-term abuse of alcohol or other substances after they cause brain damage. According to black bear rehab , it can cause permenent damage to the human mind and body.
According to gomentor.com some of the symptoms are closely related to those of dementia caused by Alzheimer’s. They include memory impairment, personality changes, and impaired judgment and trouble with language.
How is Mr. Adams doing today?
Mr. Adams lives in a boarding home and has been there since December 2014.
According to his daughter he is quite healthy and in good spirits but he has a lot of regrets.
“He often tells me that he messed up, and hates that he didn’t do right by us, my brother and our mother. When my dad gets in this state, I encourage him that he has the mind of Christ and that God has already forgiven him for his sins,” Mrs. Carter said.
His daughter also shared that because part of his brain has already been damaged, his doctors don’t think pursuing a neurologist will be beneficial.
Overall, Mr. Adams is still considered to be pretty healthy, Mr. Adams has minor issues like problems seeing with his eye different times of the day and frequent headaches as a result of prolonged drug use.
"He’s always laughing and cracking jokes and is able to carry on conversations. He also goes to church twice a month,” Mrs. Carter said.
Mr. Adam’s daughter does not mind doing what is needed for her father. When he was in the hospital she did not mind bathing and even now.
One tip that Mrs. Carter gave to caregivers is to not be overwhelmed because providing care for someone can take a lot out of a person.
In closing, this is his story, but it is a story of hope and a warning for us all. It could be anyone’s story. His daughter wanted to share the details to help save someone’s life. So often these things are not talked about and it is important to shed light on the damage alcohol and drugs can do to the fragile body. Our bodies aren’t equipped to handle toxic substances.
His daughter says there is always a warning before destruction.
“You don't have to take the path of anybody that is negative. That choice is your free will and you make that decision to do right or do wrong. Instead, choose the path to accept God and keep love in your heart for mankind.
"Unfortunately, my dad’s taste for drugs and alcohol overtook his desire to want his family.
"I’m not a doctor, but I do believe if daddy would’ve stopped the drugs sooner he would probably not have been diagnosed with dementia and need extra care. He can tell you that he had warnings. Like most of us, daddy was very stubborn and did a lot of what he wanted to do, and this is the result. Through it all, we continue to stay positive and move forward,” she said.
