The Choice to Medicate | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

The Choice to Medicate

My experience with Fluoxetine

36
The Choice to Medicate

Many people have complemented my newest tattoo since I got it done last February. It is a black and white piece of chrysanthemums (my birth month flower) with a garden snake (I love snakes). What I don't tell other's is that there is a story behind my decision and timing to go, I got this tattoo on Valentine's Day 2016, it was a tumultuous time.

February 13th, 2016 my parents were getting ready to head out on a Valentine's Day trip that would leave me home alone for the weekend. I had been visiting my therapist at the UNF counseling center for nearly four months and had recently gone to a psychiatrist, Jane. Jane had prescribed me Prozac, Fluoxetine, A Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor. I sat in my room fighting back tears while I fidgeted with the bottle, reading the label and the warnings. I was thinking to myself, "how did I get here?"

In high school, I was strongly opposed to drug/ alcohol use. I had never had alcohol, more than a sip in curiosity of what my parents drank at dinner, and certainly never done any form of recreational drug whatsoever. Never even flirted with smoking cigarettes or drinking. I spent my senior year eating a mostly raw vegan diet and abstaining from bad influences. I didn't want anything to distort my reality and my "true" self/personality and I felt very strongly that drug use is a lazy way to temporarily solving an issue. And here I was, a few years later, holding a prescription that could alter my way of thinking, my very mind. Would I be myself?

When it comes to taking antidepressants there are so many issues and thoughts that spring to mind..."Will I face negative side effects?" "Will I lose a part of myself?" "Is it a sign of weakness that I can't handle life without drugs?" "What other ways will this change me and my thinking?" This is my experience, so far, with choosing to take an antidepressant.

Fluoxetine is an SSRI discovered in 1972. Normally when neurons in the brain send out serotonin the excess is absorbed through an uptake pump, however, with an SSRI this uptake is prohibited and so more serotonin remains in the brain. This reaction does not come without side effects of course. The common ones include dry mouth, trouble sleeping, loss of appetite and weird dreams. Beyond this is the risk of increased depression in some, even risk of suicidal behavior, mania, seizures and these are all more common in patients under 25 years old.

"Sweetheart, are you ok?"

It was my mom who had carefully walked over and was standing over me, watching as I stared at the bottle. Then I broke. I sobbed quietly from a mix of emotions; fear, disgust at myself, disappointment at myself and under all that, a tinge of hope. Maybe this would be what I need, just a boost in to recovery. With the encouragement of my mom and my dad who came in also and said "this too shall pass" I made my decision, opened the bottle and took my first dose.

It took a couple weeks before i noticed anything really and even then the change was slight but very effective at reducing my anxieties and cumpulsions. I noticed that I was no longer nervous and uncomfortble around food. I did not feel like meal times dictated my day. Before it seemed almost as if one bite too many would send me into despair and start an exhausting cycle of worry and doubt. With prozac I noticed myself feeling free from this grip and able to spend my day how I liked.

Since starting my medication last year I have had times which my prescription has run out or times I have attempted to no longer take it. Within a week I begin to unravel and I loose my ability to have a social life, sometimes it takes a while to notice the change and get back on my medication. I have had to find peace and patience with myself during this time. It's not easy deciding to begin taking medication but sometimes it is necessary. I hope that one day, with the proper tools, I can eventually go without my SSRI

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

4470
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

450698
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

22333
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Moana's Top 10 Life Tips

"Moana" is filled with life lessons that involve far more than finding true love as many other Disney movies do.

45233
Animated image of a woman with long dark hair and tattoos
StableDiffusion

1. It's easy to be fooled by shiny things.

Digital image of shiny gemstones in cased in gold. shiny things StableDiffusion

Tamatoa created a liar filled with shiny things simply for the purpose of tricking fish to enter and become his food. He too experiences a lesson in how easy it is to be tricked by shiny things when Moana distracts him by covering herself in glowing algae so Maui can grab his hook.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments