Have you ever wondered why millennials are the way we are?
To start with, you can break major differences between the millennial generation and the ones before it into three distinct categories: relationships, politics and faith. There have been many attacks on the millennial dating culture, as well as our more liberal-leaning political views and our lack of serious faith. Each has a specific cause and you’ll see why emphasis on one simple thing can change the course of American history.
Relationships:
Let’s face it, millennials. We’re scared of commitment. We don’t want anything serious. We’re content to hide behind our phone and play mind games with the person on the other end of it. We’re happy to add “Snapchatting” and “talking” to the phases of a relationship. We’re shallow, in essence, and more willing to confide in our friends than in our significant others.
Why are we so afraid of commitment? Because we’ve seen it go wrong. Every day. In our own homes.
Parents, did you really think that the 50-percent divorce rate among married couples wasn’t going to have an impact? Did you honestly, in your heart, think that the increasing number of children growing up in a single- or separated-parent household wouldn’t change things?
The statistics are clear: children who grow up with two married, stable parents have better outcomes than those who don’t. Because my generation has grown up seeing the fights, the arguments and the court battles, they have grown to associate that with marriage and commitment.
That’s why we’re scared. That’s why we hide. That’s why we refuse to open ourselves up. Because we’ve seen what it can be like. And we know we don’t want that.
Politics:
According to several sources, the millennial generation is the most likely of any group to identify as a political independent. We support the Bernies and Trumps of the world, because they are the closest thing we have to an independent candidate. We, more so than any other generation, are angry at the political establishment, on both sides of the aisle.
Why? Again, because we’ve seen it.
We see it in the national elections, where both sides of the aisle put out candidates that could care less about the good of the people, instead interested in lining their pockets and résumés.
We see it in my home state of Oklahoma, where the state government repeatedly sends out the message that it does not care about its children, by continually cutting education funding at every opportunity while lining the pockets of the wealthy and of big business.
We see it in Europe, where many British millennials are furious at their parents, who just took away their right to freely live and work in 27 other countries through the Brexit vote.
We see it in Congress, where the House and Senate seem intent on acting like our $17 trillion national debt is a problem for the next generation, something to slough off on the kids and tell them to deal with it.
We see it, and we hate everything about it.
Faith:
This one is a direct result of the first two points. Most Americans ages 35 and up would readily identify as a Christian if asked. Honestly, a large portion of millennials would, too. But the number of people who wouldn’t is increasing daily. Many millennials now identify as atheists or agnostic. I know, I see them and talk to them every day at college. They aren’t bad people; they just refuse to have anything to do with religion.
Why? Because we’ve seen it.
We see Christianity and we see the people who have given us these relational and political crises in the first place. We look at the Bible and we see a book of love, but we look at Christians and we see hate. We read the Bible and we see teachings on the value of marriage, fiscal responsibility and kindness, then see parents, politicians, and business leaders who have completely and utterly failed at living these out in their own lives.
We look at Christianity and we see hypocrisy. So we leave. It’s that simple.
So you’ve read this far, and you’re wondering, perhaps fairly, why the title of this essay focuses on family, but all I’ve really discussed so far has been millennials, and how we come by our quirky views and societal customs.
Here’s why. A renewed emphasis on family first would solve every one of these problems with my generation. Think about it for a second. Imagine parents renewing their commitment to a long and stable marriage, sending the divorce rate plummeting. The statistics of kids being more set up for success with married parents would slowly begin to come true. These parents, being more connected to and more focused on their family, would start to attempt to change things in the current political and religious systems, in the hope of creating a better life for those they hold close. Millennials, instead of growing up disenchanted, would grow up with a sense of involvement and hope. They would go to church, striving to connect with Christ so they could feel His blessing in every corner of their lives. They would be less inclined to lash out at the political system or turn to socialism because they would feel welcome and involved in their own country.
It's really that simple. Every single problem, both those that face my generation and those that face our country, can be solved by something as simple as truly caring about family. But family starts from the top. That’s why the power to change isn’t in my hands (or Obama’s or Hillary’s or Trump’s), but in the hands of every parent in America.
You have no idea how hard it has been to write this. I know many, many parents who have successfully married, lived a good life and have been an amazing example for Christ. I know them, I care for them and I respect them.
It’s just that I know more of the other side and am more aware of the impact it has on my generation. I can’t stay silent any longer. Parents, you need to rethink, and you need to act now.
