AMBER ALERT: The Disappearance Of The Awkward Phase | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

AMBER ALERT: The Disappearance Of The Awkward Phase

We want braces and Hollister, not invisalign and Vineyard Vines.

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AMBER ALERT: The Disappearance Of The Awkward Phase

As a college student in 2015, one of the most frightening group of words that we can lay eyes on is, “_________ has liked your photo from (really, any year before 2014, in most cases)”. Immediately after reading a sentence of this sort, the tightening in your chest sets in because you know that someone has resurfaced to a time you thought had passed. Just when you think that you have emerged from your cocoon and transformed into someone that people can bear to look at, BAM! You are reminded of a darker time, a simpler time, and dare I say…a more awkward time. The awkward phase was real for all of us, and though we hate to admit it, we are better people for surviving the years of stunna shades, missme jeans, and American Eagle Polos.

But wait, wait wait wait, hold the phone, where did it go? Where are the braces, what happened to the acne, and why the hell does this 13-year-old average about 300 likes on Instagram? I'll tell you why; because the youth of today no longer start from the bottom. I have a theory that the government is putting something in the water, or that they are all little aliens on a mission to make my news feed just a tad more attractive, but either way, the awkward phase has left just in time for all of us 90's kids to escape ours. While I could potentially finish off this article with a nice little pity party about how my 15-year-old brother's friends are hotter than me and offer a detailed description of my slight post traumatic stress disorder from grades 4-12, my pride remains. I am a proud survivor of the awkward phase, and here is a little reminder of why you should be too.

1. We weren't given much.

I'm not going to say that our generation and those before us were deprived, but compared to today's teens, we were stranded on the island of the unfortunate, left only with the supplies of hair gel, eyeliner and those tiny little brushes that assisted in getting the Lunchable remains out of our braces. I suppose I shouldn't say that we survived, but rather that we thrived with what we were given. It was survival of the fittest, or if you still had a little baby fat, survival of the unfit. We didn't have invisilign and our moms cut our hair, so the fact that mirrors didn't go extinct makes our younger years a success in my book.

2. We seem a lot hotter now than we actually are.

Think about it, if we were never unfortunate in the looks department or borderline socially inept, our transformation into our totally awesome but probably still a little awkward selves would be meaningless. Not trying to brag, but I have gotten a decent amount of pokes on Facebook from guys who never even looked my way in high school (now thankful that they didn't), and I know that most of us have been hit with the always flattering, "Boy, have you changed". The best part about rock bottom is there's nowhere to go but up, and here we are.

3. We weren't forced to grow up too fast.

It makes me nervous how "mature" these teenage hotties are today. I have this one freshmen in high school couple that I find myself Facebook stalking daily. They recently celebrated their 2 month anniversary, and let me tell you, they are in it for the long haul. Every Man Crush Monday is celebrated, and no Woman Crush Wednesday passes without a reminder via social media that they will be together ~5 Ev3r~. Personally, the only thing I loved at their age was my knock off coach purse that I got from a gas station, but times are changing. Eight year olds have iPhones, twelve year olds wear shirts with marijuana leaves on them, and thirteen year old girls have boobs. We may have been weird, but we were fun and I wouldn't trade my 18 year (and still continuing) childhood for anything.

4. We aren't alone.

Lucky for our generation, we were all weird looking at one point. Everyone has a few pictures deep within the world wide web that they would rather remain stashed away for all eternity. None of us were ever as cool as we thought at the time, but as a collective group, we ruled the world school. You can either sit around and be salty every time someone resurfaces an old picture or brings up the not so good ole' days, or you can accept the fact that we are who we are because of who we were (getting a little deep here). A wise man once said, "started from the bottom, now we're here," and boy is that the truth.

I have no shame, check out these pictures I recovered from my Myspace.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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