I once knew an extremely wealthy individual. He saw the world through a financial lens. He saw everything in value propositions -- everything -- from the resort he went to, the financial status of those he worked out with, the financial situations of those he occupied his time with as well as the kind of cars others drove.
If someone disagreed with him he perceived it to be jealousy because he could never be wrong. If someone looked up to him, he looked down upon them for their worth must be less. His self worth was from financial success, and he judged others based on their financial worth and success as well.
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I once knew a girl who was smart. She saw the world in shades of academic ability --everything from what kind of people she would associate with, speak kindly to and who was worth her stare. She regarded any one who had varying viewpoints to be ignorant and jealous. But if someone was kind to her its because they admired her intelligence and wanted access to it.
She measured her self through papers, standardized tests, grades and acceptance letters. She naturally measured others based on their academic achievements as well.
I once knew a man who was socially inept. He was gawky, and awkward and he saw the world as a food chain, and he was at the bottom. Everything was like this -- from the way that he got treated by the store clerk, the way that the mailman addressed him and all the people who gave him funny looks at the gym.
If someone treated him poorly it was because they thought they had more worth. Yet if someone was kind to him it was because they felt badly for him. His perceived self was from the social chain. He measured those around him based on that chain as well.
What do you most often use to measure the value of your own life? Are you a athlete, naturally gifted at sports? Maybe you excel at your job and are the highest paid employee. Perhaps you are the most gorgeous or the most outgoing. Maybe its the relationships you have and connections that you choose to measure yourself by. Possibly its your good deeds or service work.
I can bet that you measure it through something or even a combination of things. Yet there is one that I bet stands out to you. One that is factor of your happiness and well being. The way that you are measuring your self is the way that you are perceiving and measuring others. The way you measure yourself is the way that you are assuming others measure you.
If you measure your life by your faith, then you will also measure others by that same standard, on their church attendance or the ways that they choose to follow god. Yet if they don't show up to church, drink too much or something else that you perceive to be unholy you most likely judge them as unassuming christians, full of sin and irresponsibility.
We are all human. I judge too. I have my flaws. Im not trying to in any way saying that the ways in which you judge are wrong. There are plenty of important values that are worth judgement, such as on those who steal from others, men who abuse women. I judge abuse and foul play because those are my values, and things that I will not stand for in myself or my family members, there for why I wont stand for it in others.
We all grew up differently, however, in different towns, cities, communities, religions, incomes, ethnicities, cultures and so on and so forth. Because of this we all come to the table with a different tool box, filled with different ways in which we see and fix the world around us.
The point is, our differences make us human. Our flaws make us relatable, our differences make us beautiful. Take a second to assess what kind of lens you are using. Is it one based on values, is it one based on aesthetic reasons, is it one based on popularity, faith, monetary funds or something else?
It's necessary to accept that others measure themselves and the world differently than we do. Its okay that they view the world differently than you do, its beautiful, its what makes us all different as cliche as it sounds.
