Life unfolds in the present. But so often, we let the present slip away, allowing time to rush past unobserved and unseized, and squandering the precious seconds of our lives as we worry about the future and ruminate about what's past. We're always doing something, and we allow a little time to practice stillness and just being.
There is a quote that has stuck with me ever since the day I read it, “If you are depressed, you are living in the past, and if you are anxious, you are living in the future.” Too often we dwell on intrusive memories of the past or fret about what may or may not happen in the future. When we’re at work, we fantasize about being on vacation; on vacation, we worry about the work piling up on our desks. When our thoughts are stuck on either the past or the future, we aren’t capable of enjoying the present.
We don't appreciate the living present because our "monkey minds," as Buddhists call them, vault from thought to thought like monkeys swinging from tree to tree. It’s easy to get into our own heads and fill them up with negative thoughts, especially in todays society. If a negative thought tends to come into your head, you need to be able to recognize it and take control. I know it’s easier said then done but too often we get caught up in our thoughts and that leads to other misleading thoughts, etc.
If there is one thing you get out of this article, I hope you realize that: You are not your thoughts.
Most of us don't undertake our thoughts in awareness. Rather, our thoughts control us. In order to feel more control in our minds and our lives, we must find a sense of balance that eludes us and focus on just being.
Mindfulness is a key factor when it comes to living in the present. Mindfulness—living in the moment—is a state of active, open, intentional attention on the present. Whether you are washing dishes or tying shoes, our mind is focused on whatever we are doing. We are not thinking about the bills we have to pay, or the phone call we need to make later on. We are simply living in the moment.
When you become mindful, you realize that you are not your thoughts; you become an observer of your thoughts from moment to moment without judging them. Mindfulness involves being with your thoughts as they are, neither grasping at them nor pushing them away. Instead of letting your life go by without living it, you awaken to experience.
In her memoir Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert writes about a friend who, whenever she sees a beautiful place, exclaims in a near panic, "It's so beautiful here! I want to come back here someday!" "It takes all my persuasive powers," writes Gilbert, "to try to convince her that she is already here."
Often, we’re so caught up and trapped in our own thoughts of the past or the future that we forget to experience, let alone enjoy what is happening right now. Taking a few minutes out of your day each day and enjoying the little things in life such as taking a shower, eating a meal or simply drinking a cup of tea, can trigger positive emotions and senses. So go and enjoy that piece of chocolate cake you’ve been craving and really enjoy the taste of it pooling on your tongue and realize how nothing else mattered within those few minutes but the taste of that delicious chocolate pooling on your tongue.
Start becoming mindful right now. What’s happening this instant? Observe the moment. What do you see, hear, smell? It doesn’t matter how it feels—pleasant or unpleasant, good or bad—you roll with it because it’s what's present; you’re not judging it. And if you notice your mind wandering, bring yourself back. Remind yourself how you are experiencing this moment. Say to yourself, “Now. Now. Now.”
Here's the most fundamental paradox of all: Mindfulness isn't a goal because goals are about the future, but you do have to set the intention of paying attention to what's happening at the present moment. As you read this article and your eyes are going from line to line, distinguishing the black squiggles from the white paper, I want you to become aware. Become aware of being alive. And breathe. One of my favorite breathing techniques is inhaling for six seconds and exhaling for four seconds. May seem like a lot at first, but once you try it you realize you are capable. If you're aware that you are capable of performing those breaths, you’re living in the moment.
Nothing happens next. It’s not a destination. This is it. You’re already there. You’re living in this precious moment.
