I don't consider myself a person who holds grudges. I pride myself in being able to forgive others easily. I accept apologies without question and for the most part, have no trouble moving on. Lately, however, it has occurred to me that maybe I'm holding on to a lot more than I'd like to admit. Maybe I do have a hard time letting go.
Maybe it's because of my tendency to forgive and forget that I don't like to give up on others. No matter how many times somebody may have hurt me, I'll always believe that people are generally good. This has led to me keeping people and things in my life that were doing more harm than good. Because in my mind, it is better to keep holding onto the hopes that things could change. Not to say that they won't change, but there comes a point when you have to face reality.
Perhaps it is because 2016 is coming to a close and a new year is approaching that I'm staring at the grim reality of moving on in the face. There are people and things and ideas that I have to leave behind. It feels a little uncomfortable. Part of me thinks I'm being selfish, but the other part of me knows that this is what's best.
So I guess what I'm saying is if you're looking for permission to let go, here it is. I'm telling you to let go of those things that bring you down. As Marie Kondo says in her book Spark Joy: An Illustrated Master Class on the Art of Organizing and Tidying Up,
"Discarding is not the point; what matters is keeping those things that bring you joy ".
Now, you don't need to take this to the same extreme that Emily Gilmore does in an iconic scene of the Gilmore Girls revival (seen below at 1:17). But, you can get rid of any and all negativity in your life. Don't sit around and expect change to happen. Nothing will get better by waiting. We must be active participants in our own lives.
It's taken me a long time to reach this point, and I'm sure I'll have relapses in my ways. But, even admitting to myself that there are things in my life I have to let go of feels therapeutic. Another important point to keep in mind is that just because you're letting something go now doesn't mean you can never have it again. Things have a funny way of coming back to us when they're meant to be.
So enter 2017 with a positive and clear mind. Leave behind what does not bring a smile to your face. Be a little selfish every once in awhile. The only person you have to live your entire life with is yourself, so it's time you put that person first. It doesn't mean you're giving up, it simply means you're letting go.