One day I was just chilling in my dorm room on the good old Ithaca College campus, when I got a text from my dad. He sent me a link to an article that was titled something like, “Signs You May Be A Bit Of An Awkward Individual.” My dad had written in the text, "I saw this and it made me think of you." Gee, thanks Dad. Of course I related to everything on the list because, well, it’s no secret that I am indeed a bit awkward. Combine that with being flat out weird and you get…awkweird. Did I just make that up or does that work exist already? I’m not sure. Anyway, I know that I’m awkweird and I’m proud of it, even if it gets me into cringe-worthy situations sometimes. If you, too, want to be a fun mixture of awkward and weird, just follow these simple steps.
Food is not just for eating. It is for wearing too.
Whoever told you that food is meant to go in your mouth was only half right. Food is also meant to be worn on your face and fall on your lap. If you are eating something particularly messy, like spaghetti, and you don’t want your clothes to get stained, I would suggest wearing a bib or simply not wearing one of your favorite outfits. Feel free to use your hands while you eat, regardless if it is meant to be finger food or not.
Trip over everything and anything, even flat surfaces.
You can easily play it off cool. Just smile and laugh and pretend that you meant to trip like that.
Laugh after every single thing you say.
“I just got home from the mall, HAHAHA!!!” How is that funny, you ask? I don’t know, it just is!
Randomly start dancing to the song that is playing in your head.
It does not matter if you are in public. Do it anyway. You’re definitely a great dancer, that’s why everyone is staring.
Say something that makes sense to you but absolutely no sense at all to anyone else.
Act younger than your age.
Freak out every time you see a Disney character you really, really love, such as Olaf. I mean, look how cute he looks in his Hawaiian outfit!
Spill your drink.
In fact, spill your drink more than once! I bet the person you spilled it on really needed to cool off anyway.
Drop whatever you are holding.
Pick it back up. Then, drop it again.
Don’t make perfect eye contact with people.
You might give them the impression that you are a normal, functioning person. You need to establish your social awkwardness immediately.
Don’t stand or sit still.
Move from side to side and twitch often.
Strike a fun pose for a picture.
It’ll look cool, right?
Stuffed animals can talk.
In order for other people to hear them, though, you have to speak for them. So make Mr. Dog and Mr. Bear talk to whoever has the pleasure of getting to meet your best friends! Yes, my stuffed animals are (probably) my best friends.
Start a conversation and quickly make it uncomfortable without meaning to.
Honestly, just talk.
Start saying words and you’ll probably say something that makes people either look at you funny or laugh. What was it? What did I say that was so funny?
As strange as you may be at times, you’re still lots of fun and the world just wouldn’t be the same without you! Honestly. You really make the world a better place. P.s. It turns out I did not invent the word awkweird. Oh well.