Loneliness is a painful emotion, enough to make one break down if subjected to long strains of isolation, rejection, and solitude. Even in the midst of family and friends, one can feel like an outsider to the rest of the company, a drifter trying to find a place of their own, to be recognized and admired; as if they want to be texted and acknowledged, rather than to text and wait for a response, The despair of being alone and unheard can be anguishing, where internal cries are muffled and the silence is deafening. It breaks a heart to suffer alone, unacknowledged, and left behind, as everything else happens without their presence.
Perhaps, they've tried their best to interact. Perhaps, they've tried getting out of their comfort zone, a shelter for emotions and safety, and try new things to engage and be full. However, it may be hard for others to find their place in a social environment, where interaction is everything, and the limitations are things that may be beyond the scope of circumstances. Some people wonder if their efforts are really worth it in the end as if things matter in the first place. Some envy or wonder how easy it is for some others to be accepted and known, a piece of a puzzle in which they are a part of in a continuous cycle of engagement. Some wonder if they could or would be loved.
That's the fear of being alone.
The emotional struggle of dealing with loneliness can be crushing. Anxiety can consume one's thoughts and constantly plague them with a slew of confusion and rejection. Depression can weigh on one's heart, making them doubt themselves and their worth. The state of being vulnerable makes one's skin crawl and numbs the mind, scared and powerless, wondering what's next in life. The agony of being unheard of makes one wonder if they have a chance at conversations in the future. Optimism dwindles, like a candle in the wind, as pessimism and self-loathing can crush one's dreams and sense of self. The pressures of conforming, yet a question in direction can make one lost.
Loneliness can swallow one up, be a part of every part of their lives, from waking up to another day, to the class and workplace, to insomnia. Questioning the strength of one's relationships can be agonizing, consuming, where they desire to be desperately heard., but muted by the fear of embarrassment and shame. One can watch the mistakes of the past, present, and future, and become obsessed with fixing their lives to better, but worry about failing once again. Self-blame weights down on the soul, like an anchor in the deep, vast ocean, and makes them drown in dejection.
Loneliness is a harsh, cruel reality that many faces. A problem where many do not recognize in others. It's a sadness that cannot fully be measured, like the emptiness of space, where it's dark and there's no one else to explore with.
