Social media really has created a hub for posting expectations and admirable “relationship goals”. How many of these posts are actually considered “relationship goals”? Is buying your girl Victoria Secret underwear, yoga pants, a jersey shirt, and some perfume to top it off and dropping it off at her doorstep the ULTIMATE relationship goals? Is buying your man a new play station with some games, pizza, some sodas, and flaunting it online goals to be expected when in a relationship?

Don’t get me wrong, by all means spoil the heck out of your significant other however you’d like and it’s not a bad thing to buy each other gifts. I’m just saying why aren’t goals that aren’t materialistic praised and recognized more often? More often than not, you aren’t going to find worthwhile relationship goals conveyed on social media.

My “relationship goals” revolve around things that portray love and unity, trust, and commitment:

1. Being dependable.

You have to be able to rely on your significant other whether it comes to remembering to pick up some groceries or being a person to confide in for some heart to heart talks. Through thick and thin, while being on top of the world or down in the pits, after an argument or during a highlight of your relationship, being consistently dependable is definitely an admirable quality. There is no picking and choosing.

2. Having each other’s best interests at heart always.

If I’ve learned anything from my personal experiences, relationships don’t work well if you aren’t selfless when it comes to recognizing and praising your significant other for their accomplishments. You have to have their best interest at heart regardless of whether or not it benefits you.

3. Sharing the same values.

You don’t need to necessarily share all the same values, but you should share a good majority of the same values as your significant other. Opposites may attract, but you will soon learn you can’t be happy with someone who doesn’t see things the same way as you.

4. Being faithful.

The one you are with should be the only person you want 24/7. You have to be honest with yourself and if there are other people causing your attention to be diverted, you need to reevaluate your end goal and decide whether or not your heart is really in it. You also must have faith in each other through any doubts or fears that may arise in order to battle through them.

5. Loving wholeheartedly.

You can’t love someone sometimes. You can’t love someone half way. You have to love them with your whole heart all day every day despite the anger, tears, frustrations, and fights that come and go, as with any relationship.

6. Communicating constantly.

Your relationship is doomed if there is lack of good communication skills. Communication is KEY to any relationship (professional or intimate) and not being able to recognize and address problems that may arise or communicate thoughts and feelings effectively will surely result in mutual destruction.

7. Being best friends.

Your significant other should always be someone you can laugh with until you’re in tears and having stomach cramps. They should be someone who you can trust every single aspect of your life with and love doing everything with. They should be your best friend and enhance your life, not make it miserable.

8. Making compromises.

Relationships are never easy. Sometimes you both need your alone time; sometimes you just need a girls or guys night. Maybe one night you want Chinese food and your significant other is really feeling some Mexican food. Whether over silly things or not, you and your significant other must be able to work out compromises consistently. It should never constantly only be one person making sacrifices for the other’s well-being and satisfaction.