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The 9 Stages of Completing a School Assignment

What is so scary about a 10 page and 1,000 word minimum due at the end of the week anyway?

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The 9 Stages of Completing a School Assignment
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It is August right now and that means summer will be winding down and school and college will be starting again, much to a majority of the general public's dismay. This means trading beaches for books, pools for pens and pencils, tans for teachers, and procrastinating for....procrastinating. As we all know from that "SpongeBob" episode, procrastination is not a good thing, but is something that is so hard to avoid. This is especially true on school assignments such as essays, reports, presentations and even those dreaded group projects. Like most things in life, trying to start something comes in stages, and it is especially true when it is 3 a.m. and you have yet to type a single word. Here are said stages:

1. Eh.

More than just a Canadian saying, this stage refers to the contemplation of the idea of whether or not it is a good idea to quit being bored by doing nothing and turn to being bored by doing so tedious and overwhelming. Maybe I should have not gotten out of bed this morning.

2. Ugh... Okay Maybe.

You know what, I'm going to have to make a decision eventually so maybe just do it now and get it over with. Or you know what? This couch is so comfortable I just can't leave it. It needs me. Can it just be summer already?

3. Fine.

Okay me. You've lost this battle. Time to get to work. Besides, who knows what wonders await for me on the internet, other than Facebook. Twitter, Instagram, cat videos, and all the SpongeBob memes one can devour?

4. What am I supposed to do again?

What is this assignment supposed to be again? Oh, a 10 page paper on the American Revolution? Oh, and it needs to be double spaced with a margin, contain a works cited, state references, and include personal one-on-one interviews with Barack Obama, the Pope, and Beyonce? Ay caramba!

5. Oh, I think I got it now.

Oh yea! Now I know what to do. Maybe I was just overthinking. This should be a breeze. Call me Mr. Nike because I can "Just Do It."

6. Now it is getting so easy, it should be illegal.

Yup. Oh wow I am on page 6 already? How so? What is this sorcery that is making it so easy to complete an unrealistic endeavor that is essay writing? This is really nothing.

7. Almost there.....

Oh how I can almost see the light. 1 all nighter, 2 bathroom breaks, 6 cups of Starbucks, 960 words and several other useless statistics later and here we are. Just gonna breathe and sweat heavily as I finish this....

8. I can smell the sweet smell of being done.


"And so that is why the American Revolution was an important moment in American history." Oh crap I see a typo in the third body paragraph. Better fix it before the Federal Bureau of Improper Grammar comes for me.

9. Done.

And then comes the next assignment.....


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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