Coffee is often regarded as the most consumed beverage on the planet and for good reason: it saves lives. Well mainly people's who are morning people, who are at risk from everyone else, because let's face it no one gets out of bed easily. Especially me. Coffee gets the normal people out of bed and able to function for the rest of the day, I have been drinking coffee for twelve years now and over the years I have learned a thing or two about the many people who consume this tasty beverage. They come in all sorts and sizes just like the many sizes at Starbucks.
1. The Snob
They refuse to drink coffee from anywhere that isn't their usual hangout, and if you do manage to convince them to go anywhere else, expect to have the worst visit because all they are going to do is complain, complain, complain. You were probably better off going to where they usually go, because by the end of it your coffee will start to taste like all of their complaints.
2. The Latte's Man
They say the like coffee, but really all they really like are lattes. They are an espresso lover. Now don't get me wrong, there isn't anything wrong with a latte every now and then, but you should also enjoy the wonderful, wonderful taste of coffee. It'll change your life. Or you won't like it because it isn't foamy enough.
3. The Black Like My Soul
This is a coffee drinker after my own heart. The black like my soul camp only orders drip coffee, and then drinks it like that. Most of them will order the strongest brew to prove how "manly" they are. However, they can barely stomach it and then usually add cream and sugar. However there are a select few, almost like an elite coffee drinking task force, who can consume the black gold without anything extra.
4. The Do You Want Coffee With Your Creamer?
These people are either avid frap drinkers or they put so much creamer in their coffee that it is almost white. These people are at an incredibly high risk of dying; I mean I know I'm worried about them. I'm worried that one of these days they are gonna go into a sugar coma because their "coffee" is so sweet. The point of drinking coffee is to actually taste the coffee, not just the sweetener you added.
5. The Liars
These people are my personal favorite. These people like to say they don't drink coffee, or that they don't need coffee. They are either morning people, aliens, or liars. And it is obvious that they are liars. Coffee is the lifeblood of the world; without it, we wouldn't have anything to drink at coffee shops. "Order tea," you say. That's ridiculous. The only people who drink tea are British, I mean I should know; I'm British.
After drinking coffee for twelve years you see a thing or two, or three or five. There are plenty of ways to drink coffee, these were just a few of the most common types of coffee drinkers. Well except the liars, they don't count because they can't admit that they love coffee to anyone except themselves, making their lies hurt every cup of coffee around them.
