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The 5 Stages Of Procrastination

Hit the books the day, or hour, before you need them.

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The 5 Stages Of Procrastination

It’s midterm season again. For many people, this means putting off all possible work until absolutely necessary. So, in light of exam week, here is my compiled list of self-diagnosed symptoms and stages of procrastination. If you can relate to all five qualifications, then congratulations. You are a true procrastinator.


1. Denial

At this point, there’s probably at least a week’s worth of time before your assignment is due. To you, that seems infinite. You don’t even bother to worry, let alone think about all of your responsibilities. You block out any form of “work” from your awareness. You file all of your obligations away into a locked cabinet that is stored into the deepest corners of your mind. In no way are you remotely stressed.


2. Contemplation

Maybe you should start writing that paper, review those notes, or do some of that reading. You mull over that possibility for a little while, but you laugh to yourself soon after. You aren't an overachiever. There’s still time and it's definitely still not worth your energy.


3. Freak-out

Somehow, within what seemed like an instant, a week passes by and you still find yourself with nothing to regurgitate besides those 10 episodes of "Parks & Rec". Your due date, or exam, is tomorrow. You are in awe over how much work has “suddenly” piled up. The non-procrastinators of the world tell you how “screwed” you are when they hear of how little you’ve done. You panic quite a bit.


4. Boss

You are determined and, suddenly, nothing stands in your way. Through the aid of an energy drink or simply your own adrenaline, you somehow manage to crank out all of those assignments in one frantic night. It’s 2:30 a.m. and you breathe out a sigh of relief. You also pat yourself on the back with a smirk because you got your last laugh at those non-procrastinators. Once again, you’ve impressed yourself with your ability to drown yourself in work and then rise to the occasion through panic. Despite the potential lack of quality, you are still amazed that your brain even held the ability to work at that speed and capacity. Given these capabilities, it dawns on you how efficient and successful you could actually be. You promise yourself that you will change your habits. You know that it will be for the better.


5. Repeat

Of course, you still stick to your old ways. The motivation never truly seems to kick in at the appropriate times. Your next assignment isn’t due for another week and you can only think about how you somehow managed to pull through last time and that time before. This is enough incentive to continue on with your laziness and put off more of your work. Why start that assignment now when you can still lie in bed?



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