Tinder matches and “Netflix and chill” are the societal norm for our generation nowadays. What ever happened to real dating, am I right? Nothing compares to the way dating was in middle school. Gone are the days of boys’ only pick up line being “Can I borrow a pencil?” Thankfully, I’m here to provide some nostalgia. Most middle school relationships can be broken down into five simple stages.
1. Setting your sights on someone fine.
Maybe she sits next to you in math class and has wicked multiplication skills, or maybe he’s the only kid in the sixth grade that can sink a free throw on the basketball team. Either way, you’ve just found someone that you have to date. Dating them is now your top priority.
2. Finding out if they like you too.
Alright, so you kind of like this person now. First, you have to find out if they like you too. This is probably the hardest part. Obviously, you’ll have your friend ask for you. (Asking them yourself would be so embarrassing!) If they say no, you’ll have to find someone else to like and start the whole process all over again. If they say yes, you’ll move onto stage three.
3. Getting up the courage to ask them out.
There shouldn’t be too much fear when asking the apple of your twelve-year-old eye to be your significant other, because you can just have your friend do it for you! If you went through stage two, you should be in the clear and have a babe without worry. Congrats, you’re in a relationship!
4. Never talking to them again.
Nice, you finally got the girl/guy of your pre-teen dreams! Now ensues the period of time where you both mutually ignore each other’s existence. Talking to each other is way too awkward and weird. The only communication you could hope for is the occasional “wuts up” AIM instant message.
5. The breakup.
Ah, the breakup. Breaking up with your significant other in middle school is rather easy. You can just write “It’s over” on a scrap of paper and have your best friend pass it over to him during in class. There was no time for crying or feelings, because in about two days, they would probably move onto your best friend. After all, there aren’t that many other kids in your grade.
