You've decided to try eating at a new Chinese restaurant, despite what people have complained to you about how terrible it is. It's time to see for yourself the real verdict of this restaurant. Here are the stages you will go through if, indeed, it is bad.

1. Chow mein stage.

You get the craving for Chinese food and you only have one restaurant in town. You decide to try it. You call them up and order a ton of food due to the fact that it is so cheap. They tell you about 15 minutes. You are starving and 10 minutes later they arrive. You get your food and begin to chow down.

2. Sweet and sour stage.

For as many bad things as you may have heard about the place, the food is not bad, especially for the price! You down your food and begin to develop a food baby. Uh-oh -- your stomach starts to feel a little uneasy.

3. Kung po stage.

It's been about an hour since you devoured your food. You begin to have some serious stomach pains and you think to yourself, What have I done? You stretch out on your bed and hope for the best.

4. The pu-pu platter stage.

Hours later you are in the most vulnerable stage. Your stomach is uneasy and you have to be cautious of every step you take. The flatulence is real and you need to get to the bathroom. Just as quickly as you ate the Chinese food, it is out of you and you couldn't be happier.