As I sit and watch those around me, those in long lasting relationships, I can't help but wonder why they believe that's what love is? Our society is blinded by the movies, music lyrics, and tabloids idea of love, which is why we believe we deserve it.

Here are 10 examples of what love is not:

1. Love is not having your significant other tell you who you can and cannot hangout with.

If you are in a healthy relationship, you do not need each others permission to hangout with other people. The source of this issue is simply trust issues. Your girlfriend can be friends with other guys, just like your boyfriend can be friends with other girls. That's life, get over it and move on.

2. Love is not being controlled in every situation imaginable.

Some people believe that being controlled by their significant other is a sign of protection, but little do they know it's actually destruction. Your relationship should not completely be based off of what the other person wants. Do what you want to do and go where you want to do. No one owns you.

3. Love is not name calling, even if you are joking.

As a college student, I witness this problem more frequently than I would like to. For some reason, couples believe it is acceptable to call each other demeaning names. If it is not along the lines of babe, baby, sweetheart, honey, etc, it should NOT be coming out of your mouth when referring to your significant other.

4. Love is not threatening to hurt you neither physically nor mentally.

Unfortunately, the statistics for relationship abuse in college is nearly 45% for both women and men. Whether it includes rape, stalking, verbal or physical, this problem is as at an all time high in our society today. No one deserves to be scared or threatened into a relationship in fear of what is becoming.

5. Love is not thinking that cheating is just a phase.

If stay with a parter who confessed that they have cheated on you, you need a reality check. Most likely, it was not their first time cheating nor will it be the last. One a cheater, always a cheater. It's as simple as that.

6. Love is not distancing yourself from friends and family to spend more time with them.

Your friends and family have been by your side and supported you through many situations in life. It is extremely unfair to distance yourself from them once a significant other comes into the picture. A relationship can be viewed as unhealthy if you spend too much time together just as much as it would be if you didn't see each other much at all.

7. Love is not crying because of them more than laughing with them.

If you come to realize you have more tears streaming down your face than laughter coming out of your mouth, you may want to rethink the way your relationship is going. Find solutions to the problems, some may be an easy fix. If not, maybe it is time to focus on your own happiness for a while.

8. Love is not constantly giving them what they want.

First things first; it is okay to say no. I know you hear it all the time, but if you don't want to do something, you are allowed to decline. Most people have the mindset of always wanting to please the other person, but your feelings matter just as much as theirs do. Stand up for yourself if you are unhappy.

9. Love is not just telling them things they want to hear.

As an elementary school kid, you are told by peers that if someone compliments you it means they like you. The idea of this continues throughout our lives because we simply like to hear whatever makes us happy. When it comes to love, action is key, not just words.

10. Love is not changing yourself to be accepted by them.

This is one of the most common issues in our society today; changing yourself for someone else. Many people don't even realize they've changed when it does occur, it most likely noticed by close friends or family members. If you cannot be yourself around your partner, find someone else who appreciates your values.

Our society has a problem of mistaking such a powerful emotion with a belittling substitute. Love is meant to be the greatest feeling in the world, but overtime it has evolved into such a demeaning concept. Open your eyes and realize what you are entitled to. We all deserve love, real love.