We met at a coffee shop on Tinder.
Social Media -- a term that has only been relevant in the past decade or so. It’s completely unbelievable that smartphones and apps like Facebook and Instagram, that we scroll through numerous times a day, didn’t exist 10 years ago. Some of these apps have only come about in the past five years. Facebook was created in 2004, Twitter in 2006, Instagram launched in October of 2010, and Snapchat only came about 4 years ago in 2011. Feel old yet? It’s incredible to think that there was a time when you didn’t feel the need to check your Facebook notifications or spend down time scrolling on Pinterest. However, what are even more interesting are the apps that have replaced normal day to day interactions, like meeting people.
In 2012, the social media app that changed the dating game forever was initially released. Say hello to Tinder.
The glorious game that lets you judge the opposite sex based solely on looks. Your physical appearance and choice of pictures give someone the control to either right swipe you, saying you're an acceptable match or left swipe you, so your opportunity to talk to them over the app is lost forever. Giving young people the ability to scope out a date, a hookup, or just browse around and see who's out there. Available at any time of day or night and at the touch of a button, basically for our generation this is our dating world.
Sounds like the perfect way to meet your soulmate.
When the app’s popularity started to rise, it became known as more of a game than a date finder. Something to laugh at to pass the time away.
We’ve all been there when you're laying on your friends couch talking about your oh so single life and someone shouts, “guys! let’s go on Tinder!” *while you aimlessly swipe away, laughing at cheesy pickup lines, sexual bios, and awkward mirror selfies*
Then reality hits us. We are older and wiser now, we know the only guys we are meeting are the ones at the bars Friday night and the “never going to grow up” frat stars on Saturdays. So at one point we decide, hey, maybe this app isn’t so much of a joke, but a chance to find a true knight in shining armor.
I mean it works for other people right?
We all have those lucky friends who found their true love scrolling around social media one day. So even though all you're getting is weird guys messaging you inappropriate comments, you still hold on strong to the hope that you’ll only be as lucky as your friend to find someone decent who will take you out on dates, touch your butt and buy you tacos.
That’s not too much to ask for right?
People always argue about the impact of social media on millennials whether it has been good or bad. It’s not my place to say which it is, and I feel like it won’t be apparent until years from now when we can see what the effects have had on us growing up. However, I can tell you, from a millennial standpoint that I kind of feel sorry for our generation. I mean I obviously didn’t live during the 70s or the 80s, but according to my parents and John Hughes films, it seemed like a great time to date.
The dating game has been completely transformed. It’s a one in a million shot nowadays that a guy will walk up to you in person and ask you out to dinner or maybe instead of a phone call he shows up at your front door to give you flowers when he rings your doorbell to come get you. Maybe he makes plans that go beyond Netflix and chill. It’s so easy to hide behind social media for fear of rejection and like I said apps like Tinder and Bumble allow us to do so. To just scroll through options and decide on a couple pictures and a short bio if they are potential people we could get along with, and sadly most of the time it doesn’t even go beyond that.
Like what? How sad is that!
Millennial singles don’t go ask out the good-looking person in line with them at Starbucks, or the cutie in their communications class, but instead, re-download the Tinder app that has been deleted again and again every time you're “talking” to someone.
Side note, don’t even get me started on “talking.” It’s a sad excuse for someone to say we are more than hook up buddies. "But we genuinely hangout even though it’s always in a room, with closed doors and…" okay stop.
Anyway, back to the dating analysis, let me make this clear, it is not by any means the guy's fault entirely. Girls have turned rare acts of character by men, like being asked out in person or receiving extra attention, as acts of Stage 5 creepers. We can't tell anymore what the difference is between them and gentleman. It's horrible; we automatically think guys that are too good to us can't be real.
Here are the facts, both parties want it to be relaxed and without pressure because that’s all we know. Therefore, a first date is usually settled for meeting at a bar or a party for a quick drink or a text from the guy saying “come outside I’m here” and then you spend the night watching a movie and maybe talking for a little. Let’s be real, as nice as the idea it is to be able to search for the perfect guy or girl on Tinder, for most of us nothing comes of it, they are just profiles. No one can deny that it would be nice to have an app that maybe can also teach our generation a few things about getting themselves out there in the real dating world. But for now, it looks like we’ll go back to crossing our fingers and right swiping away, hoping we will come across someone with good pics and texting talent to woo us in. Be that as it may if you're courageous enough to move outside this sad little comfort zone and ask the next hottie you see out on an actual date, props to you. Maybe you’ll be the change to help us all with the dating game.
