“I wondered if that was why God hated sin, because of the destruction it caused. For a moment I felt awe for a God who loved me enough to hate the things that hurt me without hating me for causing them.” – Susan E. Isaacs

About two years ago I was romantically involved with this amazing woman, who shall remain nameless, for about six months. We spent almost every day together and unless you were in my inner circle of friends you would have no idea that this relationship was transpiring in my life. Throughout the entire relationship, I felt a tug on my heart simply asking me, was what I'm doing right in the eyes of God? But, because I really wanted things to happen my way, in-spite-of everything that I knew about God at that time, I still searched for every loophole that I could possibly find to keep things the way they were. I can honestly say I fell head over heels in love with this woman, but there was still something not right in my heart about the relationship.

So here is how it all started, she had been flirting with me for months but me being who I am it literally went over my head, in one ear and out of the other… I paid her NO attention; but, she was persistent. Until one day we started hanging out with mutual friends and soon things went from harmless flirting to us being very “intimate” (I’m going to keep it rated PG) on the night of my twenty-second birthday and that is where it all started. The sex was literally the key to unlocking the door that led to a six-month relationship.

Now, almost two years later I bring this topic up because the Holy Spirit revealed to me last week what that tug on my heart meant; and I must say this changed my view on the LGBTQ community forever. God was not upset with me because I loved her, He was upset with me because I was having sex with her. Just as He was upset with me for having sex with every man I had prior to marriage. No sin is greater than the other. Being the woman I am now, I do believe that a woman and man are supposed to be together especially if you are living fully under the system of God. I am not knocking anyone, these are my personal beliefs. Nevertheless, I bring this up because it is a topic that needs to be discussed in the Christian community. It is something that we love to sweep under the rug like it isn’t there, like it doesn’t exist, but it does.

To be in the body of Christ I am utterly ashamed of anyone who calls themselves a Christian who has ever held one of those raggedy signs that either state: “God hates Gay People/Fags/Queers,” “You are going to burn in hell for being Gay!” or “God doesn’t love you.” All of these are the furthest thing from the character of God; God is love, and would NOT say anything that would push anyone further away from him. Matthew 15:8-9 states “These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship is a farce, for they teach man-made ideas as commands from God.” I am 100% sure that God did not command anyone living under the reign of Jesus to HATE or KILL a group of people based on their sexual orientation. Again, that is not in the character of God, God is a just God and He is a good God -- meaning there is no evil in Him and unlike man, He cannot be tempted with evil. He cannot be persuaded to do evil or even change who he is, so long story short, God has been the same God prior to Genesis 1:1.

God knew that we would never be able to reach his level of holiness, righteousness, or perfection. We are sinful creatures by nature, we are born into sin, and honestly, we just love living in it. Hence, the importance of the slaying of the last lamb, the ultimate sacrifice; taking He who was blameless in all His ways and allowing His death to basically pay our cover charge at the door. And when I say cover charge I don’t mean women pay $5 before 11 pm and men paying that typical 42.50 plus tax, with no hat, sneakers, or tall tees allowed in the building. I mean, Jesus literally stepped in front of us and took the beating and the death that we were supposed to receive, because we all know the wages of sin is death, BUT the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 6:23).

So, before anyone feels the need to throw any Old Testament scriptures my way, telling me how wrong I am, let us all take a look at Matthew 5:17-18 shall we?

“Don’t misunderstand why I have come, I did not come to abolish the law of Moses or the writings of the prophets. No, I came to accomplish their purpose. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not even the smallest detail of God’s law will disappear until its purpose is achieved.”

And by the grace of God, it was…

With this, I say… if you are going to boycott, and riot the LGBTQ community, please do the same when you find out your daughter or son is having sex before marriage, or out in these streets getting so drunk they can’t even remember their name. Or maybe all these married folks having affairs, or just anything that is sinful in the eyes of God. I AM NOT JUDGING ANYONE, nor, defending my past! I am simply stating that this is not the time to pick what is good and what is not when it has already been laid out for you. Or the time to allow hatred to run wild in your heart, but, the time to love others in such a way that it transforms lives, because you may be the only sight of Jesus anyone ever sees.

Jesus said himself, that He did not come for the ones who think they are righteous and know it all, he came for those who are aware they are sinners (Matthew 9:12-13). He came to heal, not to hurt. He came to save not to judge and to be quite honest, I still need saving every day of my life, I will never be “saved” -- that is past tense. So as long as I am alive, I am humble enough to say I need God.

I honestly want the hate to cease, the only thing it is doing is dividing the body of Christ and causing people to walk further away from God, fulfilling the enemy’s purpose.

Until the day our love for God’s people rises higher than the love we have for our own selfish desires, nothing will change in this world.

So please remember, God doesn’t hate you, he hates sin, and the destruction it does to mankind…

I love you guys so much,

-Di.

P.S: If you have any questions or would simply like to talk/pray you can email me at dianiellison@icloud.com

Have a Blessed Week!!!