I'm a talker; all my friends will tell you that. I love to tell them all about the experiences I have had or that I am currently working through. I thoroughly enjoy relaying stories about my life with each and every intricate detail, and I think that the best way for somebody to truly understand the experience that I so definitely want them to hear all about is to have all of the sensual details along with the basic plotline. Otherwise, how is one expected to empathize even slightly with me or offer their insightful advice to my situation?
I love sharing my experiences primarily to see what perspectives are offered as responses to my stories. Everyone has a different set of value preferences and life experiences; thus, the response that I receive from one friend is usually very different from the response I receive from another. Moreover, I love sharing my experiences because it opens up an opportunity for the listener to share a personal experience similar to the one that I chose to relay to them. This is cool because it creates a bond with the other person and proves that all people go through situations that they may have never expected to endure.
Plus, telling stories means that there is never a lull in the conversation; there is always something interesting to talk about whether it happened yesterday or in the last three years.
However, I have learned that not every person is a good listener.
To be a good listener, you must show genuine enthusiasm in the story that is being told to you. Focused eye contact, no distractions, and positive body language are three important factors to be sure to incorporate when you are listening to somebody talk, no matter who it is that is doing the talking. Whether the story-teller is your co-worker that you still do not know entirely well, best friend from high school, a cousin from out-of-town, or significant other, they deserve your entire undivided attention. Why? Everyone deserves a good listener. Always.
No matter how ridiculous their story seems, no matter how long the story seems to be taking, always, always, always give the story-teller your undivided attention. For some reason, they feel compelled to share this moment with you. And because of that, you should feel extremely thankful to be included in the sharing of a personal experience of the other person. They must feel comfortable enough to give you the details about their life, and that is special despite what the subject matter of the story is.
Giving the storyteller your undivided, most focused attention will definitely be noticed and received very well by them... probably way more than you may realize. Take it from me, an avid story-teller who never fails to leave out a minuscule detail, having that attention means the world to me.
So, to every genuinely interested listener, I want to take this time to thank you for not only your open ears but also for your reaction to my stories. Whether this is nodding along and showing off proper body language, offering answers to my inquiries, or sharing your own similar experiences, I am eternally grateful for your attention, your time, and your existence. Thank you.
