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The 10 Inevitable Stages Of Thanksgiving For A Vegetarian

Holidays aren't always mashed potatoes and green beans.

Emily Powell

Nov 21, 2017

University of Miami

The 10 Inevitable Stages Of Thanksgiving For A Vegetarian

Pexels

Thanksgiving: the day comprised of gratitude, family, and tradition... which all revolve around eating turkey. Being a vegetarian on Thanksgiving can be a struggle. Here's how it all goes down:

1. You are forced to cringe at the smell of the turkey for many hours because it cooks literally ALL day.

2. While inhaling this relentless stench, you pray that the sweet potatoes have a high ratio of marshmallows on top.

3. You also hope that the hostess kindly considers the minority vegetarian group and makes vegetarian stuffing.

4. The food is finally served after a full day of eagerly anticipating. You sprint to the green beans and fill up an entire plate’s worth.

5. You get some dirty stares from distant relatives because you selfishly take all of the side dishes.

6. But the sides aren’t even that good because they are just vegetables...

7. … So you save lots of room for dessert.

8. You wait patiently for everyone to carve the turkey and dig in so the table can be cleared for dessert.

9. One younger, immature cousin must always be obnoxious by trying to make you eat meat even though he/she knows you have been a vegetarian for years.

10. The adults take their last sip of wine and begin clearing the table. BRING OUT THE PIES AND ICE CREAM BABY

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The 10 Inevitable Stages Of Thanksgiving For A Vegetarian

Holidays aren't always mashed potatoes and green beans.

1. You are forced to cringe at the smell of the turkey for many hours because it cooks literally ALL day.

2. While inhaling this relentless stench, you pray that the sweet potatoes have a high ratio of marshmallows on top.

3. You also hope that the hostess kindly considers the minority vegetarian group and makes vegetarian stuffing.

4. The food is finally served after a full day of eagerly anticipating. You sprint to the green beans and fill up an entire plate’s worth.

5. You get some dirty stares from distant relatives because you selfishly take all of the side dishes.

6. But the sides aren’t even that good because they are just vegetables...

8. You wait patiently for everyone to carve the turkey and dig in so the table can be cleared for dessert.

9. One younger, immature cousin must always be obnoxious by trying to make you eat meat even though he/she knows you have been a vegetarian for years.

10. The adults take their last sip of wine and begin clearing the table. BRING OUT THE PIES AND ICE CREAM BABY

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Actually, Kylie Jenner, 2018 is the year of realizing things.

Waking Up Early in College is So Much Harder

You Have to Get Used to Walking Everywhere

Fuzzy Socks are the Cure to All Problems

Take Every Opportunity to Get Free Food

It's Okay to Gain the "Freshman Fifteen"

Invest in Vitamins and Supplements

Making Time to Clean is Essential

Drinking Water is Actually Important

Cs get degrees!

1. Me after every class

2. If you really care about your grades

3. When you get a new homework assignment

4. When people ask what you're going to do after college

5. When you see people who don't study and get good grades

6. We're all broke here

7. FREE FOOD IS FREE FOOD!

8. When it seems like everyone in class is smart - EXCEPT THE PEOPLE IN YOUR GROUP PROJECT!!

Other than knowledge and all those important things

How to take stairs.

Caffeine is your friend.

How to study.

Finding free food.

How to take a nap anywhere.

How to appreciate sleep.

How to procrastinate productively.

Surprise: This is not on the syllabus

1. As a freshman, one does get to be called “freshman” by upperclassmen when they walk to parties in a mob of people.

2. Some of the best stories happen after 2 a.m.

3. Upperclassmen live for meal swipes from freshman because they are poor and need free food.

4. People are struggling just as much as you are so you're not alone.

5. You will never take privacy or personal space for granted ever again.

6. You are not the only one who has slept on the community bathroom floor after a night out.

7. Skipping class for Netflix is a valid excuse.

8. It’s totally acceptable to bring a pot of coffee, a sleeping bag and a pillow to the library.

9. Having class with a friend is the best because you can trade off days on who goes to class.

10. When you are a senior, you take the easiest classes to boost your GPA.

11. How to pull an all-nighter.

12. How to handle drunk people.

13. The drunk you does not look out for sober you about 90 percent of the time.

14. How to deal with a hangover.

15. How to interact with people very different from you.

16. The perfect amount to procrastinate on every assignment.

17. How to pass a class without paying for the textbook that was "required."

18. How to calculate your grades to see what you need on every test in order to maintain a passing grade.

19. How to hook-up with someone without getting emotions involved (but we all know that doesn’t happen).

20. How to handle your roommate when you want to strangle them.

21. That you miss your parent’s every day.

22. How to get into a bar when you aren’t 21.

23. How to BS on assignments, out loud and on your resume.

24. That theme parties are the greatest.

25. How to find free events that have free food.

26. That when there are puppies on campus it will be the greatest day of your life.

27. Alarms are necessary and you must set like seven of them in order to wake up in time for class.

28. Greek parties are exactly how they are in movies.

29. Care packages are treated like Christmas presents.

30. The friends you meet in college will become your bridesmaids and groomsmen.

31. That printers only break when you need them the most.

32. Cereal, ramen noodles, Easy Mac and microwavable pancakes can be used for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

33. That classes before 8 a.m. should be illegal.

34. Changing your major is OK.

Don't let the thesaurus-inspired vocabularies in our résumés fool you. We're actually just big kids.

"You should know exactly what career is right for your future by the time you're 18."

"Save all your money."

"Get plenty of sleep and adjust to a regular sleep schedule."

"Make sure to eat healthy, balanced meals. Don't forget those fruits and vegetables."

"Surround yourself with good, moral people."

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