This past weekend I played the final game of my competitive career in soccer. That’s weird to say. It’s something I always knew I would say someday, but I guess sometimes “someday” comes a lot quicker than we might have imagined. The thing is, soccer has been a huge part of my life. From house league when I was little, to the craziness of high school, playing all year round, and finally my small but wonderful JV team here in college.

To me, and to many other athletes out there, soccer is more than a game. Really, I’m not just talking about soccer; this applies to all athletes in all sports. It’s more than the rules, the running and the sport itself. It’s the team, the early weekend wake-ups, the conditioning, stress relief, the mid-game frustration, overtime and penalty kicks, and rain delays. It’s knowing at the end of every day that I have put everything into something, and because of that, I’m going to see a difference.

This sport has been a huge part of my life, and losing it is a big deal. I’m asking you to let me grieve. I’m going to be sad, and that’s okay. Please don’t dismiss my sadness. Your dismissal not only claims that all of my above thoughts are invalid or unimportant, but also dismisses my emotions as unwarranted. So, the next time you’re about to say, “It’s just a sport, you’re fine,” think again.

However, this is not just about the sadness of being done. This is about thanking the sport. I can’t begin to express what this game has given me. It has made me who I am today, and I am so grateful. Grateful for the opportunity to play this beautiful game, to have so many incredible teams throughout the years, and grateful for the confidence and love of life that the game has instilled in me.

I’m thankful for team laser tag and can drives. I’m thankful for eight-dollar limits at Wegman’s and the youth soccer shirts that I can finally wear because they were so big back then. I’m thankful for turf burn, playing under the lights, and Christmas tournaments. I’m thankful for making t-shirts with puffy paint that all have the same motivational quote on the back, and for the inevitable strife that comes with moving a goal. I’m thankful for Halloween practices and dedicated coaches. I’m thankful for timed miles and hill repeats, followed by entirely unhealthy portions of pasta. I’m thankful for a game that is more than that- one that I got to grow up with. I’m thankful for the time my sister and I decided to use our garage door as a goal, and broke so many things, and for the times we played soccer in the kitchen with the empty coffee cans and somehow didn’t break anything. I am thankful, simply, for the ability to be so thankful.

Day one, 3^rd grade, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.

Thank you soccer, for a crazy ride.

Much love <3