As I grow and mature through life, I look at the people who have helped me become the man I am today. My parents have always been there for me, the rest of my family and my friends have greatly helped me mature; however, one person has influenced me more than any other: my big sister. Being seven years older than me, my sister experienced high school and such before I did. She excelled academically, athletically and was a great friend to many that still value her friendship to this day. My big sister has been more than just that to me; Kimberly has been my support system, she has been a life guide and most of all, she’s been my best friend.

There is one story my mom loves to tell whenever she gets the chance: the first time my sister held me as a baby. Everyone knew back then that the only person I wanted to be held by was Momma White. The first time my sister held me, despite her optimism, nothing went any differently. As my mom set me down in her arms, I screamed and cried, and my sister was sure right then that I hated her and always would. Eventually, I got past being held by no one but my mom, but I am still quite the momma’s boy. As I grew up and started to learn to talk, one of the things I couldn’t say was “Kimberly” instead it came out “Beeky.” Of course, I grew out of that too but I still occasionally refer to Kimberly as Beeky, and every time we can’t help but crack a smile.

Growing up, my sister and I fought and argued just like siblings do. On long car rides, I would hold my finger just barely off her arm and whisper “I’m not touching you.” I would also hide fake spiders and lizards in her bed for her to find. One time I even threw a real lizard in her hair (the tail broke off on her head and my life flashed before my eyes). She would use her size to mess with me. and my dad would always say “you know, one day he’s going to be bigger than you.”

My sister has saved me and bailed me out in many ways. In fact, she literally saved my life once. The family was at my grandpa’s pool. and even though I didn’t know how to swim, I thought it would be cool to take my lifejacket off and dive in. My parents were not watching me closely enough to see me pull the genius maneuver, and I quickly realized how mistaken it was to think it was a good idea, as I sunk down to the bottom of the pool reaching trying to find something to grab. As I hit the bottom of the pool, I see Kimberly diving in, as she wraps her arms around me and lifts me back to safety.

As I finished my elementary school years and was facing middle school, my sister was graduating high school and preparing to go to college. Through all of the bickering and fighting, I thought my big sister was my arch-nemesis… I would soon realize just how wrong I was. I had just stepped into the teenage years of my life and we all know what that means.

Moving through middle school and into high school, it became more and more clear to me how much more than a sister Kimberly was. She was always ready to give advice, she’d tell me things like; “brush it off buddy, it’ll get better” or “Trevor that was dumb, don’t do that again.” She was there for me as I faced drama, bullying, girls, and life as a whole. When I got to a time in life where college was something I needed to be worrying about, I wasn’t. As my sister noticed the mistakes I was making and that I wasn’t worried about my future heading in the right direction, she stepped in.

My sister did her best to help me get to a good place for me and my future by being the best role model she could be. In reality my sister was my saving grace, she didn’t have to do or say much but she went out of her way to talk to me as a friend. She showed me where and how I was going wrong, she got me to do my college applications like I should have been. I was accepted to ASU for the Spring 2016 semester and even though I would have been content with that my sister showed me that I could visit and meet with an admissions counselor to possibly move my admittance up to Fall 2015, she was right and I was accepted and admitted for the fall. My sister’s ability to see more in me and help me see it too is something I can’t thank her enough for.

Yeah, my sister is pretty great, she helped me figure school out and motivated me to be better for my future but there is nothing that measures to how my sister showed me how to be a good friend in every kind of relationship. She would always say “it takes being a good friend to have good friends,” I always took it literally; be a friend have a friend, but she meant it for more. I realized this when I was in a weird spot with a girl, I went to my sister to try and figure out what to do. She told me; “whatever it is, whoever it is, no matter the kind of friend whether it be boy or girl, romantically, a bro, or even family… be there for them, be open with them and they will be open with you, love them and be there for them, remember what they love and don’t forget what they hate, and be yourself.” She assured me that if I remembered these things I would never be upset with how my relationships went. Since then I have used what she told me every single day.

Kimberly has always been someone I look up to, she has been my rock to lean on, she has been my guide, and the best friend I could ever ask for. Through the past 20 years the effect my sister has had is unquantifiable; all the motivation, all the reassurance, the times she picked me up and brushed me off, and the fact that she showed me how to make the most out of what I’ve got.

So, Kimberly, thank you for everything you’ve done, whether you knew you were doing it or not and for being my role model. I guess going to all those softball tournaments, the swim meets, and the lost games of “mercy” were worth it. Thank you for showing me how to be a good friend, for showing me to set no limits, and for teaching me that saying “calm down” has the exact opposite effect. Everything you’ve done still affects me daily and has helped me become a person I am proud to be today so thanks big sis, I love you.

Love your little bro.

p.s. Still not sorry for putting that lizard in your hair.