It seems like just yesterday that I was running through the quad, hugging all of my college friends that I hadn’t seen in three months. It seems like only two days ago that I was moving in as a freshman. But it isn’t two days ago, and I’m about to be a junior in college. I had hopes for my second year of college, and I couldn’t wait to create a whole new set of memories with some of the best people I know, all while being at Villanova. The year was a far cry from what I thought it was going to be. I laughed a lot, I had a lot of fun, made new friends, created new memories, and had new adventures. I took a few cool classes, studied hard and had some amazing opportunities come my way. But I also cried a lot. I lost friends as I made new ones, I missed more class than I could have ever imagined I would, I failed more than I wanted to, and my heart was broken by people who I least expected it from. I struggled to adjust from a freshman to a sophomore; an adjustment that no one prepared me for. Anything bad that happened as a freshman, well, I was just freshman. It’s all part of the experience is what I told myself last year. But, I wasn’t and am not a freshman anymore. And anything bad that happened, it wasn’t just because I was a freshman, it’s just life.

I learned a lot these past two years, and looking back on every single moment of it, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. Maybe the way our tournament run turned out or having more of those chocolate chip muffins we all love from Holy Grounds, but nothing else. I learned what it was like to go from having some of the best moments to some of the worst, all in the blink of an eye. I learned what it was like to lose a friend you thought would be there forever over silly arguments and differences I was once blind to. I learned what it was like to think that someone would be the same as they had always been, but only to watch them turn into a completely different person right in front of you. I learned what it was like to grow up, and grow apart from people. I learned what it was like to get rejected from things, over and over again. I learned that sometimes going back to some people, wasn’t the right thing to do. They’re in the past for a reason. I learned that rushing into things was never a good thing either, especially because not all things last forever. I learned what it was like to have your heartbroken, and long for the better days where we all smiled easier and laughed louder.

For the first time, I doubted that I even belonged at this school. I doubted that I fit in, that I had found my home away from home. I doubted that I’d make it until graduation here, and at one point even considered all my other options. I also learned that I am terrible at accounting, group projects are the absolute worst, saving papers till the night before they are due isn’t smart, and applying for jobs is worse than applying for college.

I struggled too. I struggled to let go of the past and live in the present, while not getting caught up in the future. I struggled to figure out if I wanted to give up a semester at Villanova, with some of the best people I’ve ever known, to go explore a whole other part of the world. I struggled with figuring out what I would miss out on more, traveling to countries I’d already seen or missing 21st birthday’s and Hoops Mania and living with my future roommates, and everything that came with it. I struggled with realizing that experiences I once had, won’t ever happen again, and I’d have to be okay with that. I struggled with understanding that sometimes people change, and that it’s okay because it doesn’t mean they care about you any less. I struggled with understanding that not everything was going to be perfect, and I struggled with feeling like I was the only one struggling.

But, it wasn’t all bad. In fact, there was so much good that came out of everything, and that’s really why I’m writing this. Because, even during the lowest of the lows, there was still something about Villanova and my classmates, my family, that made me want to keep fighting. I learned that sometimes, people you never thought you’d be best friends with, turn out to be the people you can’t live without. I learned that the little adventures are the best ones, and that to have fun doesn’t always equate to something crazy. I learned that it’s not what that matters, but who. Quality over quantity, always. I learned that even if someone changes, parts of them are still there. They still care about you and love you just the same, and that will never change. I learned to forgive and move on, that holding grudges and being angry were wasting everyone’s time. I learned to appreciate every laugh, every smile and every good day. I learned that being by yourself is okay, in fact, everyone should do it sometimes. I learned that hard work is the only way to get anything done, and the reward was twice as great. I learned that old friends and new friends together, make the best of friends.

I learned that at Villanova, people care more about each other than they do themselves. I learned that even if you miss two weeks of school and then some, there are still people who care enough to FaceTime me daily and laugh with me and smile with me. I learned there are some people who will be there for the very highest of the highs, and the very lowest of the lows, and love you just the same. I learned that there are people I can count on when I need them the most, and that it’s people like this who will make my last two years here some of the best. I learned that sometimes the best medicine really is laughter and chocolate covered pretzels from Holy Grounds. I learned that it is, in fact, okay to struggle, and to cry and to be angry. I wasn’t the only one, and will never be the only one. I learned though, that smiles and good music and ice cream and movie nights can go a long way too. I learned that Wawa at 2 am while FaceTiming old, but new friends is one of the best ways to spend a Friday night. I learned that it is okay to eat an entire Domino’s pizza. I learned that it is okay to grow up, and grow apart from people because that’s life and it always goes on. We can either stop and hope that something good comes along, or we can just keep going and take it day by day-whatever happens happens. I also learned that, sometimes, group projects can lead to some great friends, that even if I’m bad at accounting I’ll still make it in the real world (there are computer programs that can tell me if my credits and debits match up). I learned that wearing pajamas to class is acceptable, and I learned that people are always willing to help, however and wherever I need it. Also, I learned that I do in fact have an ice cream addiction, and that it really isn’t that much of a problem.

Sophomore year was a year for the books. And as I pack up my things and study for my last final, it breaks my heart to realize that I only have two years left at Villanova. Looking at every picture from the past two years hanging on my wall, from abroad adventures and national championships to Friday nights out, I’m not sure how to handle that thought. Only two years left with people who mean the world to me. Only two years left of Oreo sunsets and January tailgates and SNAP pizza dates. Only two years left on the Main Line, and I can’t wait to see what they have in store. As two years have gone by, I’ve grown up and changed, made some of the best friends I’ve ever had, and lost some too. I’ve cried and I’ve laughed and I really have seen it all. But I’d change nothing about any of my time in college, and I cannot wait to see what this last half has in store for me. And, if I know one thing, it’s that it’ll be nothing short of amazing. Thank you for the best two years of my life Villanova, I love you, and I miss you already. See you soon.