I've been wanting to say something to you for awhile, but I wasn't really sure how. So i'm going to do it right now in this article.

Mom, thank you. Thank you for not giving up. You kicked cancers butt.

I know there were times, most of the time, when you just wanted to stop. You wanted to quit. You wanted to give up. But you didn't. Thank you for that. I don't know where i'd be without you. I struggled so much while you were sick, and imagining what life would be like if you would have given up, I honestly can't even imagine it. I need my mom. I need you to tell me it's going to be okay, I need you to tell me i'll never be alone, I need you to tell me that i'll always find my way back home to you. If you would've given up mom, I wouldn't have you here to say those things to me. If I didn't have you saying any of that, i'd be lost. You're my best friend mom.

I don't know what it was like to feel so sick while you were going through chemo. But I do know what it looked like, and it looked like it was slowly killing you. And let me tell you... That was the worst thing I have ever seen. Seeing your mother in pain, laying in bed, sucks. It hurts because I always wanted to do something to just cure you and save you, but I knew no matter what I did, it wouldn't make you jump out of bed and dance around. I knew nothing I did would make up for the sicking feeling you had.

But i'd also like to say i'm sorry. I know there was so much more I could have done, so so much more. I was afraid and so I ran whenever I could because I hated seeing you so sick and so skinny. I hated not being able to sit in the living room and eat 100 pounds of food with you, so I ran and did that with friends. And I know that hurt you a lot not having me there all of the time. But I tired my hardest to clean as much as I could and help you get ready. I know it may seem as if I didn't care like I should have, but I want you to know that I cared so much and that's why I hid, because I run away from the things that scare me. But you're okay now, because you didn't give up. You fought every single day.

You showed me the definition of strength and bravery, and for that I will thank you for the rest of my life.