Dear America,

Oh Lady Liberty, how I love ya. Just thinking about your amber waves of grain and purple mountain majesty and all that jazz just gets me fired up and ready to unleash some pyrotechnics on the world (fired up= pun intended). You’re basically the red (white and blue) headed step child of Britain and the Fourth of July is our day to celebrate independence and freedom.

Speaking of independence, thanks for being the home of country music. Nothing makes me feel more free than being able to rev up my Jeep/Ford/Toyota, roll down the windows, and crank up some Kenny Chesney or Florida Georgia Line. And don’t even get me started on Zac Brown Band; the fact that a song was dedicated to one of the South’s favorite foods will forever make me proud to say I was born in the same country as them.

Probably one of my favorite places to enjoy the sweet sounds of country is by a field, which brings me to another thing I’ve got to thank you for: sports. There’s a simple joy that comes from looking at your spacious skies over a crisp green ballfield. And sure I’m not the most coordinated person in the world, but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate your pastime by admiring a nice boy in a pair of baseball pants from the sidelines (*insert hair flip girl emoji here).

Thanks for having a pretty flag. I mean let’s be honest, who doesn’t love Ole Glory, our glorious stars and bars? And the symbolism, superb. The 50 stars to represent the Manifest Destiny in it’s fullness, and the 13 stripes to commemorate your humble beginnings; it’s almost a baby blanket/timeline tapestry of your life. And while I’m at it, you get points for a cute color scheme, too. Red and blue is as classic a combination as peanut butter and jelly and it’s universally flattering. And bless Pat, praise the Lord, they’re both in my color wheel.

Sometimes I think I sing your praises too often (or too loudly, or both); other times I think I complain more than compliment. But hey America, it’s your day. You look great for your age, and dang you’ve been busy treating us with some of the best culture in the world, only a hair of which was even mentioned here. Thanks America, these works of fire are for you.

Sincerely,
Overpatriotic people everywhere (but really, is there even such a thing as being “overpatriotic?”)

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By the time this article goes up, it will no longer be the day of America’s birth but just a normal day in the US of A. But who says we have to go back to complaining about all of the political and economic crises we’re facing? Believe me, I’m not pretending that America is flawless (save that for Beyonce please), but just reminding you that no matter what we do, we are so privileged to live in such a great country. Take pride in the state you live in and treasure its history, tradition, politicians (I’m looking at you Sanford, hope the App Trail treated you well), and symbolism. Hope you had a happy Fourth, and a happy American year!