Over this past summer, I underwent a lot of personal growth (to say the least). Coming off of a bad breakup, a hard semester and a lot of emotional turbulence, I was faced with a choice. I had to learn how to be content with life despite the difficult circumstances thrown my way, or I would flounder. What I noticed when I looked around me, was that all of the people I perceived to be "happy," had many of the same things in common, and I wanted that. So recently, I too have tried to adapt what I have found to be the habits of happy people.
1) An attitude of gratitude.
People who are happy don't sit around thinking about how bad things are in their lives or how unfortunate the hand they've been dealt is. They look on the bright side and find gratitude in the smallest aspects of everyday life without even trying. I think that this is really the fundamental reason happy people are happy; they don't focus on the bad stuff.
2) They can laugh at their misfortune.
This one is so hard. People who are walking around genuinely happy, usually are able to look at the bad things happening to them and make light of the situation. Now, hindsight is usually 20/20 for me, but I'm working on being able to laugh in the moment and stop taking myself so seriously.
3) SELF-CARE.
While this may seem self-explanatory, so many people lack self-care in their lives. If we all took a mental health day every once in a while and took care of our own wellbeing, maybe the world would be full of more happy, kind people.
4) Living in the moment.
People who are happy don't sit around worrying about what tomorrow will bring, therefore letting it ruin today's joy (I'm so guilty of this). Instead, they live for the moment and try to live everyday to the fullest.
5) They're genuine.
This might be my favorite quality/habit. I love genuine people because then you never have to wonder where they're at with you or anyone else and you always know that you can go to them for an honest opinion. What you see is what you get, and that is fine by me. The way this benefits them? People who are genuine never have to waste their energy pretending to be someone or something they're not.
6) They are resilient and without fear of failure.
Failure does not scare a truly happy person, or cause them to want to back down from a challenge. At the end of the day, they know that if they fail they will come back better the next time and make changes to better themselves and others. Other people may cower away from a challenge for fear of failing but someone who possesses the gift of true happiness knows that even failing will not ruin their life (or their happiness).
7) They listen.
There is nothing better than finding someone who will actually listen to you; someone who can show empathy, without turning it into sympathy. That is what happy people do. They know that not everyone feels happy all the time and that even for themselves, a listening ear is often the best remedy. So they are willing to just sit and be there. The gift of human connection in this way is priceless.
8) They laugh at anything and everything.
People who laugh all the time make my heart happy. I love the sound of a baby laughing, or a man with a huge belly laugh. It's priceless and brings me back to the idea of that human connection. When I'm down, nothing can bring my spirits up more than someone who makes me laugh. We all need a moment every now and again where we laugh with our best friends so hard, over something that probably isn't that funny, and end up in a puddle of tears. Or at least I know I do.
9) They ignite happiness in others.
Happy people make me happy. Period. I love seeing someone who finds so much joy in their life, especially in the simple things. Those are the people that inspire me to work harder toward becoming better myself, in all aspects of my life.
10) They love themselves FIRST.
This is one of the hardest, if not THE hardest, habit for me to practice in my life. By nature, I am a caretaker and a giver. I want to fix everyone around me and I want everyone to be happy. But where does that leave me? Most of the time, the answer is miserable. While that may sound grim, the truth is it has been my experience that people who are truly happy love themselves first. They love and fix and take care of themselves before trying to do it for another human being because they know that without doing this they are useless to anyone that comes across their path. Two broken people cannot fix one another. And while I wish they could, through countless vain attempts, I know now that they cannot and trying to prove otherwise will only perpetuate the pain for all parties. So if I want to be truly happy, like some of the people I have encountered over this past summer, I need to learn to love every piece of myself FIRST.