Is there anything you've wanted your entire life?
You start imagining it when you're just a child-- the dream more abstract than the reality. You associate your goals with parts of the world you've already determined you like: you want to be a paleontologist because you like dinosaurs, not considering the hours of hot, dusty, manual labor. You want to be a doctor because you like helping people, not thinking about the massive quantities of bodily fluids associated with medicine. You want to be an ice cream taster because you love ice cream SO MUCH (honestly I don't see any downsides to this one).
My dream has always been to become a teacher. Both of my parents are middle school teachers, so I knew what a teacher did before I even started attending school. Right away I started making those connections. I like learning. I like helping others. I like talking (and talking, and talking). I like to read and write. I also knew from a very young age that I wanted to pursue a goal in life that would make a difference, and what better way to do that than to be the one who educates the future doctors, paleontologists, and ice cream tasters of the world?
As I got older, a lot of the careers that used to seem so appealing seemed to lose a bit of their luster. While digging up dinosaur bones or tending to human ones still seemed cool, I also came to recognize the factors that would keep me from wanting to do those jobs for the rest of my life. Teaching, though, never really lost its shine. When I realized that teaching at a college level would allow me to combine my two greatest passions-- teaching and writing-- I was sold. I was going to be a university professor.
This summer, I am getting the opportunity to start living my dream. I'm working with graduate student colleague to teach an introductory course to incoming freshman at Pacific. It's the first step on a journey that will take five more years of graduate school to fully realize, but it's a pretty great first step. I get to plan lessons, present lectures, and facilitate discussions. I get to grade papers and give feedback and experience the joy of seeing the lightbulb go on in a student's head. It's exhilarating and fulfilling and only reinvigorates my drive to make this into a career for myself. And let me tell you, I have never been this excited to get up at eight in the morning every day.
I'm learning from my students, too. I'm being reminded that energy and enthusiasm go a long way toward engaging people. I'm learning that a room full of 17 year olds can never be entirely compelled to keep their cell phones put away for three consecutive hours. I'm seeing that everyone learns differently, and at different paces, but if you're dedicated to teaching them, then they will learn.
On the one hand, it makes the thought of going back to my normal school schedule at the end of August sound kind of dismal. I don't want to sit in a classroom anymore; I'm eager to lead one. In fact, it's all I want to do at the moment. That said, it is just validation that I'm on the right path. I don't just enjoy the idea of teaching, I really, genuinely enjoy the act.
And being able to live the dream? That makes all the hard work well worth it.
