The media has struck again, as I predicted in a previous article I wrote about Media Abuse towards women. This time, however, they are 100 percent on the mark. I mean, honestly, I don’t think they could have hit the nail on the head any better than they have.

I’m here to explain to you, the public, why Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift are definitely getting married. Well, first of all, let’s start with the Met Gala interaction. Fate sat them at the same table, but the unimaginable attraction that they must have felt towards each other is what led them to the dance floor. If I found someone who would dance with me to the Weeknd’s soulful music, we’d basically already be at the church. Anyone who is willing to dance with Taylor, who is a self-proclaimed bad dancer, in public, must be moments from getting down on one knee. The question of who took the video of them dancing remains a mystery to me, but it was probably an act of God, preparing the world for what was to come.

The second piece of proof for why they are definitely getting married is the pictures of Taylor and Tom, Tomlor as I like to call them as of just now, at Taylor’s Rhode Island home. We all know that she definitely bought this house so that she could be wedge her way into the Kennedy family, but it will now serve as a fantastic family home for the litter of children Tomlor is destined to breed. These pictures reveal a Tomlor relaxing, taking selfies and even kissing each other. Cue surprised emoji. It’s time for a moment of truth, definitely, every person that I have ever kissed is basically my soul-mate, and I know that the rest of the readers and the media have only ever kissed the person they were bound to be with forever as well, so this makes perfect sense.

Now, the most obvious piece of evidence is the social media activity that Taylor and Calvin have engaged in in the past day. Calvin deleted his tweet about “love and respect” and they both have removed every piece of each other from their social media accounts. My assumption is that Taylor is clearing out room for the wedding pictures of her and Tom that is coming. Some, however, assume it is because Taylor might have been cheating on Calvin (Adam) with Tom and s*** hit the fan when the news broke.

So in conclusion, Tomlor are definitively headed towards the altar. Never in the history of the world has a woman kissed a man ~two weeks~ after a break-up for any reason other than true love. Let us not be doubtful, if the media reported that Calvin and Taylor ended only 14 days ago, it is set in stone. The couple could not possibly have ended before the media knew, and it is not possible that Taylor and Tom really are just friends, it is also not possible that the media has yet again invaded a celebrity’s privacy in their own home. No, the only thing that is possible here is that Tomlor found Love In A Hopeless Place and Taylor is now shopping for her White Horse that she will inevitably ride into her wedding to complete her Love Story.