The most wonderful time of year is finally upon us: football season. It's been a long, challenging offseason all around. (Of course, for some moreso than others... Here's looking at you Johnny Manziel). But alas, college football is well underway and now the NFL regular season is here once again to bestow the gift of months of 24/7 football.
Even if you don't follow football, you've probably heard some of the headlines leading up to opening night: Tom Brady is suspended for 4 games for Deflategate, Teddy Bridgewater is already out the whole season, Colin Kaepernick is now a backup, and on and on and on. To help you get aquianted with the new quarterbacks of the NFL as well as refamilarize yourself with the veterans, I assigned a Taylor Swift song to each of the NFL starting quarterbacks. Enjoy, and Happy Football Season.
AFC North
Joe Flacco
Team: Baltimore Ravens
Song: New Romantics
Key Line: And every day is like a battle/ But every night with us is like a dream/ Baby, we're the new romantics
With Joe Flacco back on the field, the Ravens are looking for great things this season. And from what we've seen so far, Flacco has some new weapons to take to battle and if they can get the chemistry right, maybe even a championship worthy relationship.
Andy Dalton
Team: Cincinnati Bengals
Song: This Love
Key Line: This love is good, this love is bad/ This love is alive back from the dead
Andy Dalton is finally getting some respect within the NFL. He may not have the postseason record to prove it (yet, anyway) but he's becoming a major threat because of his accuracy. After missing the end of the 2015 season due to a thumb injury, Dalton is back is alive and back from the dead, so to speak.
Robert Griffin III
Team: Cleveland Browns
Song: Blank Space
Key Line: So it's gonna be forever/ Or it's gonna go down in flames
For all of the hype that came with Robert Griffin III, he's been, well, a disappointment. However, the Browns have no where to go but after after drafting Johnny Manziel and RG3 is a solid improvement in comparison. It's possible RG3 was rushed into the starting position out of college and may very well be a franchise QB someday (thus the forever). It's also possible he simply won't ever make the transition into the pros (thus the flames). Only time will tell.
Ben Roethlisberger
Team: Pittsburgh Steelers
Song: Long Live
Key Line: When they gave us our trophies/ And we held them up for our town/ And the cynics were outraged
Ben Roethlisberger is arguable the most underrated- and under appreciated- quarterback in the league. Let's not forget that Big Ben claimed his first Super Bowl victory at only 23 years old in his second year in the NFL. Even now, he's one of the most efficient passers in NFL history. No doubt Steelers fans are screaming, 'Long live!'
NFC North
Jay Cutler
Team: Chicago Bears
Song: Picture To Burn
Key Line: As far as I'm concerned you're just another picture to burn
Harsh, I know, but even Chicago fans are over Jay Cutler. Although he still plays a vital role on and off the field, Cutler seems to be past his prime and is just another player on an already struggling team.
Matthew Stafford
Team: Detroit Lions
Song: How You Get The Girl
Key Line: Broke your heart, I'll put it back together/ I would wait forever and ever
Not a strong team as of recent, the Lions are pros at breaking their fans' hearts. But if Matthew Stafford can create the right opportunities for his offense, he can put those hearts back together. Even if he has to wait forever.
Aaron Rodgers
Team: Green Bay Packers
Song: Style
Key Line: And when we go crashing down, we come back every time/
'Cause we never go out of style
Not only is Aaron Rodgers one of the more attractive quarterbacks in the league, but the Packers never really seem to go, well, out of style. Even last season when the team as a whole struggled, Rodgers still managed to lead his team to a record of 10-6. With Jordy Nelson back in the lineup, green and gold will definitely be in style this year.
Sam Bradford
Team: Minnesota Vikings
Song: Red
Key Line: Losing him was blue like I'd never known/ Missing him was dark grey all alone
The 'him' in the lyric line is most likely aimed at Teddy Bridgewater, who was all set to lead the Vikings to another great season. Replacing Bridgwater is Sam Bradford, who technically isn't starting right now because he's been on the roster less than two weeks. Hopefully, the fans get the to love Bradford like red before too long.
AFC South
Brock Osweiler
Team: Houston Texans
Song: Starlight
Key Line: And we were dancing/ Like we're made of starlight/ Like we dream impossible dreams
After sitting behind Peyton Manning for the Broncos and then leaving the Broncos for the Texans, Brock Osweiler is pretty happy to finally have a secure starting spot. Plus, he's got some pretty legit players- JJ Watt, for instance- to help him dream the seemingly impossible dream of winning a Super Bowl.
Andrew Luck
Team: Indianapolis Colts
Song: Haunted
Key Line: Can't turn back now, I'm haunted
A few weeks ago, an article was released about the best NFL quarterbacks who have never won a Super Bowl. Surprise! Andrew Luck not only made the list, but is at the top. And as the highest paid QB right now, not having that ring has got be the thing that haunts his dreams.
Blake Bortles
Team: Jacksonville Jaguars
Song: Forever and Always
Key Line: 'Cause one second it was perfect, now you're half way out the door.
There is no quarterback in the NFL that's more inconsistent than Blake Bortles. He's a classic boom or best player and when he's on his A game, he's the guy you want around forever (and always). But other days, you definitely want him out the door.
NFC South
Marcus Mariota
Team: Tennessee Titans
Song: Everything Has Changed
Key Line: All I know is a simple name, everything has changed
A tad dramatic, yes, but since drafting Marcus Mariota, Titans fans finally have something to be optimistic about. His rookie season was no Super Bowl performance for sure, but he showed his potential to one day be a franchise QB. The Titans made some smart moves this offseason, and who knows, maybe everything has changed for this once dismal team.
Matt Ryan
Team: Atlanta Falcons
Song: Bad Blood
Key Line: You know it used to be mad love/ So take a look what you've done/ 'Cause, baby, now we got bad blood
Ask any Falcons fan about what they're concerned about heading into this season and odds are you'll hear the name Matt Ryan. Despite talent and potential, Ryan had a down year in 2015 and there is definitely bad blood between him and the fans, who are most likely ready to move on to another quarterback.
Cam Newton
Team: Carolina Panthers
Song: Shake It Off
Key Line: 'Cause the players gonna play/ And the haters gonna hate/ Baby, I'm just gonna shake/ Shake it off
As the Panthers proved last year, winning in such a grand fashion brings haters. Lots of haters. And after Cam Newton's press conference debacle after losing the Super Bowl, haters flocked to him in the masses. T-Swift basically wrote the song for him.
Drew Brees
Team: St. Louis Saints
Song: State of Grace
Key Line: And I never saw you coming/ And I'll never be the same
Even though Drew Brees is a whopping 37 years old, the dude still has it. He's led the NFL in passing yards in four of the past five seasons, including the past two and is still breaking records. Whenever he decides to retire, the Saints will never be the same.
Jameis Winston
Team: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Song: 22
Key Line: Everything will be alright/ If you keep me next to you
I may have been partial to giving this song to Jameis Winston because he is 22, but it's also fitting. Rookie season is always difficult for a quarterback and now that Winston is through that, it's crucial fans stick with him and know everything will be alright, especially since Winston could very well be the surprise of the season.
AFC East
Tyrod Taylor
Team: Buffalo Bills
Song: Sad, Beautiful, Tragic
Key Line: We had a beautiful magic love there/ What a sad beautiful tragic love affair
We're less than a week into the regular season and the Bill and Tyrod Taylor, once again, are talented but a disappointment. The Bills' offense was primed to have a breakout year but despite the beautiful magic, it's a tragic love affair. At least for the moment.
Ryan Tannehill
Team: Miami Dolphins
Song: Fearless
Key Line: In this moment now capture it, remember it/ 'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this
Okay, in reality it could get better than this, but Ryan Tannehill has it pretty good. Even though the Dolphins don't have an allure of options that obvious Super Bowl contender teams do, Tannehill is making do with what he has and already looks like a serious threat in the red zone, where moments are worth capturing.
Tom Brady
Team: New Englad Patriots
Song: Better Than Revenge
Key Line: There is nothing I do better than revenge
Regardless of how you feel about Deflategate or Tom Brady in general, you can't argue with the stats screaming how great Brady is at his job. He still claims his innocence in the Deflategate debacle, and whether he is or not is irrelevant; he's seeking revenge as soon as his suspension is over.
Ryan Fitzpatrick
Team: New York Jets
Song: Hey Stephen
Key Line: Can't help it if there's no one else
Ryan Fitzpatrick had a solid year in 2015 as his first year as a Jet. Now entering his second year, expectations for the QB have gone up but there's one problem: he's kind of on his own. Key positions on the Jets team are still void and Fitzpatrick can't do it alone.
NFC East
Tony Romo
Team: Dallas Cowboys
Song: Teardrops on my Guitar
Key Line: He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
Dallas fans must have felt quite hopeful coming out of the offseason after Tony Romo missed most of last season due to a broken collarbone. But all hope of having anything but yet another mediocre season was utterly dashed after Romo broke a bone in his break 3 plays in to the preseason. Sorry Cowboys fans, maybe next year.
Eli Manning
Team: New York Giants
Song: Welcome to New York
Key Line: Everybody here wanted something more/ Searching for a sound we hadn't heard before
That 'something more' is a playoff birth in 2016. Technically, it's a sound the Giants have heard before, but Eli Manning needs to get the job done this year.
Carson Wentz
Team: Philadelphia Eagles
Song: Change
Key Line: Because these things will change/ Can you feel it now?
Change is in the air in Philly. The season ending injury to Teddy Bridgewater led to Sam Bradford getting shipped to Minnesota and thus giving Carson Wentz his starting spot on the Eagles roster. Can you feel it, Carson? (Probably. There's a lot of pressure that comes with being the starting QB in the NFL).
Kirk Cousins
Team: Washington Redskins
Song: Stay Stay Stay
Key Line: All those times that you didn't leave/ It's been occurring to me I'd like to hang out with you for my whole life
Whole life may be a stretch, but Kirk Cousins has established himself as a solid starter for the Redskins. He showed great progress last year as the go-to QB and looks ready for his prove-it season this year.
AFC West
Trevor Siemian
Team: Denver Broncos
Song: I Almost Do
Key Line: It takes everything in me not to call you/ And I wish I could run to you/ And I hope you know that every time I don't/ I almost do
The Broncos had a rough offseason in regards to quarterbacks. With Peyton Manning retiring and then Brock Osweiler signing with the Texans, rookie Trevor Siemian is essentially on his own. Although he's a promising prospect, it's hard to fill the shoes left by Peyton. I'm betting it takes fans everything in them not to call Peyton and beg him to come back.
Alex Smith
Team: Kanas City Chiefs
Song: Enchanted
Key Line: All I can say is it was enchanting to meet you
Rewind to when Alex Smith was drafted and he was supposed to be the star quarterback for the 49ers. That obviously didn't work out, but he's doing pretty well with the Chiefs. Now, the team looks more than ready for the regular season behind Smith's lead.
Derek Carr
Team: Oakland Raiders
Song: Treacherous
Key Line: The path is reckless/ the slope is treacherous/ And I like it
Derek Carr is heading into this season as one of the best young playcallers in the league, even though no one is talking about him. The slope may be treacherous, but it's safe to say Carr is enjoying himself and is looking for more.
Philip Rivers
Team: San Diego Chargers
Song: The Story of Us
Key Line: I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down/ And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.
Philip Rivers, at one point, was in the conversation about elite quarterbacks. But now it seems he's from far from that title. After winning only a handful of games last year, the Chargers love story with Rivers looks to heading south. Some might even call it a tragedy.
NFC West
Carson Palmer
Team: Arizona Cardinals
Song: I Know Places
Key Line: Let them say what they want, we won't hear it/ Loose lips sink ships all the damn time/ Not this time
Maybe it isn't what people are saying about the Cardinals, but what they aren't saying. Last year, Carson Palmer and Arizona was hugely underrated and was overlooked in both the regular season and postseason. It looks to be the same again this year, but Palmer is probably jamming to this song right now, agreeing 'not this time.'
Case Keenum
Team: LA Rams
Song: The Lucky One
Key Line: Chasing fortune and fame/ And the camera flashes, make it look like a dream.
With the hype that surrounding Jared Goff, it's a little surprising he's starting the regular season inactive as the third option at quarterback. None the less, it was lucky for Case Keenum who now has the starting spot and the chance he's been waiting for.
Blaine Gabbert
Team: San Francisco 49ers
Song: You Belong With Me
Key Line: Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find/ That what you're looking for has been here the whole time.
With the Colin Kaepernick drama that has engulfed the NFL as of lately, Blaine Gabbert has remained in the shadows. But now he's the starter, after the 49ers woke up and found that what they were looking for (a decent QB, that is) was there the whole time (and isn't Kaepernick).
Russell Wilson
Team: Seattle Seahawks
Song: Out of the Woods
Key Line: Are we out, are we out, are we out of the woods?/ Looking at it now, last December/ We were built to fall apart, then fall back together
It really is a good question for the Seahawks: are they out of the woods? After a Super Bowl win in 2013 followed by a Super Bowl loss in 2014, last year was a bit of a disappointment from Seattle. It's hard to tell this early, but it is possible Taylor Swift got it right and they needed to fall apart to fall back together.