Have you ever fantasized about meeting your favorite celebrity? I have. There's one artist in particular I'm dying to meet. When I say meet, I mean hang out with on a regular basis. When I say hang out with on a regular basis, I mean be her best friend forever.
Taylor Swift, I know you already have tons of friends. And all those other girls, well they're beautiful, but would they write a list for you? (Yes, there are plenty more brilliant song references throughout.) Enjoy!
1. I brag about her constantly
Best friends build each other up. I can’t help but gush about Taylor’s numerous accomplishments. Did you hear her latest album? It’s amazing. Have you seen her on tour? It’s life-changing. Are you aware of her endless charitable acts??? Oh Taylor, you make me so proud.
2. Her exes are on my sh*t list
I used to think Jake Gyllenhaal was the dreamiest dreamboat I could ever dream of. Then he entered into an on again/off again relationship with my main girl Taylor, breaking her heart enough for her to pen “All Too Well.” Thanks for the inspo guys, but I still can’t forgive any of you for hurting Tay Tay.
3. Her enemies are automatically my enemies
It’s the same as the exes – if you cross Taylor, you cross me. Kanye pulled a major no-no when he grabbed the microphone from baby Swift at the VMAs and he’s continued accruing bad blood ever since. You may have called Taylor the b-word, but I’ve got a b-word for you: Big Fat Meanie.
4. I already know her family
I had floor seats at the 1989 tour when security guards escorted a woman nearby. A fella seated two rows ahead loudly asked, “Who is that?” when I quickly replied, “That’s Taylor’s mom, Andrea” as if we were thick as thieves. I also know Scott, Austin, Meredith, and Olivia. This could easily double as a list of reasons why Taylor has so many bodyguards...
5. We would binge-watch "FRIENDS"
Taylor has made it known on several occasions that she’s a huge fan of the sitcom. That makes two of us. I’ve seen every episode, I quote the show regularly, and I have more in common with Monica Geller than I’d like to admit – the character I’m willing to bet T-Swizz relates to most.
6. English class was our jam
Swift is a passionate advocate for literacy. When she was young, she even wrote a novel. I wouldn’t mind reading it over while she checks out my many short stories and musicals I wrote as a kid, particularly my version of "Aladdin" using exclusively Prince songs.
7. I don’t care about the “he said, she said”
Taylor Swift is enormously famous, so naturally, a lot of people run their mouth about her. I’m rather vocal about my love for the pop star. Some see that as a challenge, trying to change my mind and deter me from being a Swiftie. All attempts are futile - BFFs for life.
8. Dry humor is the best humor
If you’ve scrimmaged through the vast dark corners of the internet for every Taylor Swift interview like I have, you’ve undoubtedly discovered that the girl is funny. She has a quick, sharp wit that can often go over an interviewer’s head while Miss Swift keeps a completely straight face, further confusing said interviewer. It’s hilarious.
9. I love her friends
The company you keep is a strong reflection of who you are. Taylor surrounds herself with the best, further proving her status as a total goddess. Selena Gomez is so beautifully vulnerable. She’s also a vocal advocate for many important causes including mental health. Blake Lively, Lily Aldridge, Hayley Williams, and Lena Dunham are just a few of Taylor’s besties who I can’t get enough of.
10. We’re both perfectionists
Even the haters have to admit that Taylor is detail oriented. Her songs, her videos, and her tours are all meticulously planned and executed. Tay, you keep on hiding obscure messages in your videos for fans to figure out. I’ll keep obsessively decoding them.
11. She’s just a small town girl
Born and raised in Pennsylvania! Those may not be the lyrics, but they’re the facts. Taylor is from a little town called Reading. Small town girls are the best - Pennsylvania small town girls are the VERY best. I’m not just saying that because I’m a smalltown PA girl…Well, maybe just a little.
12. We go way back
My obsession with her does, anyway. I was singing along to “Tim McGraw” and emulating her spiral curls back in ’06. I’ve followed her every step of the way since. Best friends know each other’s history. I may not have been there for the awkward stages, but I've seen the videos.
13. We’d tower over everybody
He might not have liked it when you wore high heels, but I do. As a fellow lengthy lady, I often receive comments from vertically challenged men questioning why I wear heels. Because I want to. I love that at 5’11” Taylor has the confidence to unapologetically strut her flawless stuff in the cutest platforms or stilettos.
14. We'd have breakfast at midnight
T-Swizzle is obviously a ton of fun. I love that she finds joy in simple things. She’s enthusiastic about Easter egg hunts, staring contests, and dance-offs. Her easily excitable nature is perfect for random BFF adventures. It's also perfect for me because I happen to live for game nights.
15. Sephora would make a killing
Miss Swift is the queen of ruby lips. I’m the queen of walking into Sephora, putting on a full face of make-up, then leaving without buying anything. I can picture us testing lip colors on each other, critiquing and finding the perfect shade. Maybe she could help me achieve that red lip, classic thing that I like.
16. We would shop together
Tay may not be a nightmare, but she certainly dresses like a daydream. She cites fashion icons like Audrey Hepburn as her inspiration. She’s stated she would love to raid Vanessa Hudgens closet. She’s been spotted in several pieces from Anthropologie. Do I love Audrey, Vanessa, and Anthropologie? Check, check, and check!
17. Theater kids stick together
It’s no surprise that Taylor landed the leading role in her high school’s production of “Grease.” I participated in many musicals in my adolescence, getting stuck as a backup dancer in “Grease” but luckily landing roles like Dorothy and the Mad Hatter in other shows. There’s an unbreakable bond that forms between those in the theater. It’s probably the show tunes.
18. Her priorities are in check
Tay Tay is a role model. She cares about setting a positive example. That’s rare these days, particularly in the entertainment industry. Some have accused her of being fake, but I think her efforts just get misconstrued. She puts her best self out there so she can be an inspiration for others. The best friends are ones you can look up to.
19. We’d have the best dance parties
Some people are graceful dancers; others prefer to dance like nobody’s watching. I am the latter. And I’m not alone. T-Swift has indulged in spastic, carefree dancing countless times. We could dance like complete buffoons together. I don't wanna dance unless I'm dancing with you.
20. I absolutely adore her
If you haven’t noticed by now, I really like Taylor Swift. It goes beyond just loving her music or following her career; I admire her character. She has this amazing ability to make her fans feel like we know her on a deeper level. She makes us feel like we are her friends.
So even if I don’t ever get to meet Taylor Swift, she will always be an idol of mine. Although I’d prefer to be BFFs.