Writer's block is something every writer goes through. It's nothing new, but I've been experiencing it a lot lately. With COVID still around and continuing to be inside more than ever (not that I was a world-class extrovert before), I should be able to come up with a bunch of new ideas and maybe try to write something, create a world; I could put it in screenplay format or experiment and try something new.
But I can't. Or I won't.
I've been experiencing crippling anxiety when I think of an idea or realize that I'm going to have to write something soon. What am I so anxious about? Why am I so afraid to write now, where did that come from? I could just now be realizing that soon I may have to prove myself with my writing and that I won't live up to the task or the job that I'm shooting for. I don't even know the steps to get there, much less how to prove myself when I arrive, if I arrive.
I've been asking myself, is not wanting to write lately a sign that it isn't for me? Am I just not cut out for it? Do I not have whatever "it" is to create something coherent and good. And I believe the answer is that none of that is true, that it's simply a combination of my regular anxiety mixed with writer's block.
I'm certain a majority of writers who read this will understand the feeling of dread at the thought of sitting down at a keyboard and devoting precious hours or even just minutes of your time, only to come away disappointed, possibly having failed at what you sat out to accomplish.
We might feel that we'll dry up our creative well, and/or lose the will to express ourselves creatively in this outlet, if at all. We don't want to be failures so for as long as we can, we won't be anything; we'll stay in limbo. That limbo, to me, is writer's block.
I know there are plenty of books and articles and medical journals and motherly advice about writer's block, but, I haven't heard any of those so here's what I think: the healthiest mindset that I've been able to think up so far is that writing anything at all is a success to a writer. The more we create, the more we know what we want and what we don't, and how to weave and mend it together with words.
And as much as I do love writing, I want to get rid of all my creative blocks. Draw something neat, even though I don't know anything about correct drawing techniques. Record a song, even though I am not the best musician I know, but I know more than some people!
When I started writing this I was anxious; fearful; worried. All that's gone now. All you have to do is get something out. I have a lot of feelings and a lot of thoughts I want to put out, somehow, and any little bit that's out of your head is less weight hanging around up there.
