The chances are pretty high that anyone reading this article has at least one form of social media. In fact, you probably have several. How many hours do we spend each and every day stalking friends on Facebook, checking up on our Instagram likes, or pinning posts on Pinterest to discover new ways to keep up with the trends? I know, for me personally, the answer is a lot.
Our generation is addicted to social media. Why is this? Well, when we receive a text message, or a "like" on Instagram, our brain receives a boost of serotonin, the thing that makes us happy. So why wouldn't our phones, tablets, or laptops be constantly attached to our arms?!
But social media brings more than happiness. In fact, social media can actually cause quite the opposite effect.
In "Rockwell," a popular nightclub in Miami, there is a mirror near the entrance with the phrase "Take a selfie" written at the top. People stop as they walk in to pose in front of the mirror and share it on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, etc.
On my 21st birthday, I, myself, stopped to pose.
After all, if people didn't know what an absolutely incredible birthday I was having, did it even count?! Of course not!!
The next day, as I was lying in bed and slowly sipping on a gallon of Gatorade, I started scrolling through the pictures I had taken of my weekend. Only 39,492,387,493 in the three days? Not too bad!
It was then that I came across the "Take a selfie" picture and took a closer look. Only after taking the picture does another line show up, below the first, that says, "Fake a life." I was annoyed at first that I'd been tricked and didn't want to post the picture. How dare the club call me out like that?! I'm not faking a life! I really did have fun that night!
But what about other times?
Life is not perfect. Not mine, not yours, and not that girl or guy who you have always envied so much. I promise.
So why is it that unless someone knows us well, they would never know this?
Because social media has taught us how to construct an image of perfection to share with all of our "friends." With apps such as FaceTune, which allow each of us to be a Photoshop professional and Instagram model, no one ever has to know about our stretch marks, love handles or the giant pimple that decided to set up camp on our chin last night.
At the worst points in my life, I have found myself scrolling through my social media platforms, wondering how in the world I could be the only one feeling so unhappy. It took me longer than I'd care to admit to understand that they weren't. I then looked at my own profile and was shocked at what I saw: a carefree girl who was traveling the world, eating gourmet meals and laughing through life with her best friends at her side.
How could it be that while I felt like my life was crumbling around me, I had somehow succeeded in maintaining an image of perfect bliss?!
Honesty Hour: This is a screenshot of my latest Instagram posts. I look soo happy, right?! Wrong. Ready for the reality?
The only real posts are the first (I made a video for class that I was proud of) and the last (I had a fun night with my friends).
But the picture of the laptop, candle, books, and coffee? I spent 30 minutes stageing it perfectly. I had finished the book the night before, the journal is full of my insecurities, the candle is unlit because I hate the way it smells, the "hot coffee" is really cold chocolate almond milk because I have Crohn's Disease so coffee hurts my stomach, and the laptop is closed because I was feeling overwhelmed by my extensive to-do list.
Should I go on?
I cried the day I took the picture in the red bathing suit.
My angel mother drove 5 hours to take me to feed elephants because I was in a really bad funk.
The picture of me lying on a tree was the only one I liked out of 500 I took. I felt incredibly uncomfortable and had knobs and jagged pieces of branch jabbing into my back.
I realized that if I could appear so happy while feeling the way I did, then so could everyone else.
I am still guilty of this. I do not wake up on mornings I feel exhausted and terrible, take a makeup-less selfie, and post it, unfiltered, to Instagram, announcing how "over today" I am.
Being aware, however, whether I'm on vacation, out with my friends, or in a museum, of living in the moment and enjoying myself, rather than constantly updating Snapchat or checking into the locations on Facebook, has made me much happier.
So has keeping in mind that no one else's life is perfect, no matter how it looks on social media!
So, next time you are doing something totally awesome, and your instinct is to snap a picture to share with friends, stop, take a second to soak it in, bask in your bliss and gratitude, and resist the urge to post. And next time you're feeling down and envying others, remember that things are rarely as great as they seem.
Sending you all my love today and always.
