I recently asked my friends family and social media folks to help me with this week’s topic. They chose this simple yet powerful line from a famous Malcom X speech. The more I think about it and the more I look around I wonder the same thing. Who taught us to hate ourselves and each other? For hundreds of years we as black people have been through a lot. The last thing we need is for us to walk around with an attitude towards each other. I was able to this divide in a lot of different areas like television, music, social media and magazines.

I really knew something was up when I was in my twenties and I, noticed that there was a lot going on that would make it hard to be black. Almost anything that had to do with being African American was negative. I am not at all a big threatening looking person, but at work if I get a little passionate or stand up for myself I am being too aggressive. That’s right little ole 124 pounds of pure thickness is capable of striking fear in to a bunch of grown men for stuff like “I just want to be treated like my peers”. Yikes! The nerve of black folks always begging for something. I should be lucky to have a job so just accept the treatment. Absolutely not and this is a whole different article by its self so let me stay on topic.

Here’s another thing I noticed the characteristics that made me “not like other black girls” by white folks were very different from what other black folks would tell me. I would hear from white folks I went to school with or worked with in the past would tell me that I wasn’t “like other black people” because I traveled and was cultured. I was able to keep up with an intelligent conversation with a diverse group of people. I was always confused by this because most of the African Americans I know have all of these qualities. It’s not uncommon for black folks to go to school now that it’s legal. One person even had enough nerve to say “I never seen black people play soccer!” Really? Cobi Jones, Freddy Abdu, Pele, the continent of Africa all black folks playing futbol. Black people don’t travel? All my books say that we are excellent travelers. We were transported against our will to America as slaves then were migrated up north and out West for a freedom. Now some of us are looking into living abroad after November, myself being one of them. So basically according to the few that said these dumb things to me I was this rare black person that was civilized enough to exist among a sea of white folks. That’s one of the many things I love about being black is that I believe that due to our history it’s in our DNA to move in a room full of vultures and I do it will in tailored ankle cut pants and fly blazers.

As for my fellow black folk I wasn’t all the way black to them either. To my own folks I wasn’t like “other black people” because I used to read books that wasn’t assigned in school. “Why you reading stuff outside of school?” they would often ask me. My reply was, “because W.E.B Dubois is nowhere on my syllabus”. Just because I was partially educated in a school system that had no black history outside of slavery does not meant I couldn’t use my library card. I also was a different kind of black person because I expected good customer service when I would want to exchange my hard earned corporate plantation money on food or clothes. I don’t have a three kids with three different baby daddies and living off of the system. This one baffled me because I expected this from the white folks not my own kind. However I would like to think that the taxes taken out from my checks at both jobs helps this “type” of black folk out, I mean you’re welcome. I am “saditty” because I refuse to go hang out in places where folks get shot at on the regular. Where have yall been the past couple of years? When I scream “my life matters” I meant from police bullets and unregistered criminal bullets as well. I know a few DJs I can get trap music without stepping foot in the trap. My favorite is “you didn’t struggle enough like real black folks.” I’m sorry half of that struggle is a choice because somewhere it was looked at as being cool to have no ambition and be dumb. As long as my skin is the color it is, I will always struggle in one way or another. Have you ever tried to explain why as the “woke” black person you are, you still love watching TV shows like “The Hills”? That is a struggle. Have you ever tried to wake someone from a 400-year slumber? There are folks walking around in 2016 thinking that they can’t get anywhere in life because they are of a darker color. This is not true we have the resources and ability to go where ever we want. Some of this is a page away in a book that we refuse to read. I am not saying it will be “easy” but we don’t easy, I have never heard an easy going story of triumph from a black person. It’s one thing to cut physical chains off a slave’s ankle but those mental ones are harder. Bob Marley said “emancipate yourselves for mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our mind.” Institutionalized racism still exists and we still have that field negro versus house negro mentality.

No matter what people told me, these negatives never bothered me. I was taught to know who I am and what I could do. I am a black person and sometimes I get angry, but I am not the “angry black person.” Yes, Im black and I went to college where I joined a sorority and graduated with a degree. This does not make me an “educated black girl” I am an educate woman. My degree and sorority also does not make me “saditty” or better than anyone who didn’t accomplish what I did. It simply means that I took a different path in life and would be more than happy to help a brother or sister out. I get why white folks vie me a certain way but I never did understand why my own people would treat me like a “red head step child”. I always thought that we were in the same boat figuratively and literally. Who taught you to hate yourself so much that it is impossible for you to see the greatness in you. Everybody else does and that is why they try to make it so hard for us to be great. Look around we could not live the lives we live without the hands of black folks. I will expand on this later for black history month but keep that in mind. What I want to leave with is this. Before we scold each other for being great, take a step back and ask “why you mad son?” Take a step back and really evaluate why you are mad at this chick because she just bought a brand new Nissan Altima coupe. Seriously we are hating on each other for the pettiest things and missing the big picture which is that we all have an un tapped talent that sometimes needs the help of others to get going. Don’t miss your break through because you are conditioned to find the negative in all that is positive.